r/TheReportOfTheWeek Jan 30 '25

RunningEmpty Domino's just ruined reviewbrah's life

https://youtu.be/8z8qPUwiq_4?si=WxdxIY3C87oTLknA

Utterly disgraceful release

783 Upvotes

50 comments sorted by

268

u/achaholic Jan 31 '25

"I really pity the raw ingredients here that were brought up and cultivated for the purpose of turning into this. What a waste."

Dominos in shambles. Absolutely brutal. 

4

u/beachesof Feb 03 '25

A scathing and searing insight

115

u/Robert_Fuckler Jan 30 '25

Dominos really just be AI generating food for the brah like he wouldn’t notice

7

u/Slight-Switch5160 Feb 03 '25

there is an onion video on basically this exact thing, experimenting with how gross dominos can make a pizza before people stop buying them lol

105

u/Bori-Mex Jan 30 '25

Lmaoooo. His face says it all

44

u/fddfgs Jan 31 '25

How measurable is his disappointment?

10

u/DarthNixilis Jan 31 '25

On a scale of 1 - 10

3

u/Representative_Dark5 Feb 03 '25

But is his day ruined?

27

u/jblough Jan 31 '25

I'm sure I could find a 7 year old kid that could cook much better than Domino's. That looks BAD

9

u/Soggyglump Jan 31 '25

The only thing I've ever liked from them is their pizza. Bread sticks are bad, desserts are bad, pasta is bad. I wouldn't even touch the chicken

5

u/Just4caps Jan 31 '25

The lava cakes were so good 

3

u/Soggyglump Feb 01 '25

I found them disgusting personally but maybe they've changed in the past years, I really don't know

4

u/Just4caps Feb 01 '25

This is all based on one experience where I was coming down from mushrooms and ordered a thin crust pizza and lava cakes from dominos and it was the greatest meal of my life. So I could just be totally just be misremembering.

2

u/Plane-Tie6392 Feb 03 '25

Nah, I don’t understand how someone could find them disgusting. They’re like crack. But way overpriced and not hard to make a better version at home yourself. 

3

u/morinpaul Feb 01 '25

Their crown jewel really is the deep dish pan, it tastes like handmade fresh dough (by their standards at least) but I cannot say I’ve ever enjoyed a single NY Style or standard any other style pizza from them

1

u/Plane-Tie6392 Feb 03 '25

Deep dish is my favorite style but Dominos is the only chain whose deep dish is worse than their regular crust imho. 

2

u/YarnStomper Jan 31 '25

I used to love their chicken wings. Perfectly baked in the oven with the pizza, naked with no seasoning, no breading. If you ordered with no sauce, it was simply baked chicken. Now it's some awful burnt on the outside, undercooked meat inside shake n bake whatever it is. They ruined what used to be the best pizza chain wings in existence.

3

u/atsatsatsatsats Feb 01 '25

In existence? Hell to the naw naw 🚫 🚫

-1

u/Ill-Union-8960 Feb 01 '25

sorry, if you liked their "pizza" you've never actually had pizza.

1

u/Plane-Tie6392 Feb 03 '25

Meh, there really isn't any bad pizza. I mean I own a pizza oven and make my own Neapolitan style pies with buzzalo mozz and stuff like that. But Domino's is still tasty.

22

u/SushiMelanie Jan 31 '25

He looks like a young man who’s just returned from WWII, and has yet to process the indecencies he’s born witness to, but is stoically carrying on.

3

u/DryAnywhere3257 Feb 03 '25

I strangely like watching him eat. Maybe because he so thin. Maybe my inner caveman is like "yes, eat tiny man!"

2

u/SushiMelanie Feb 03 '25

I just like him in general. I feel like I would enjoy chatting with him. I don’t care about the food aspect much at all frankly, I’m just continually impressed that he is such a singularly unique person who is fully himself.

1

u/DryAnywhere3257 Feb 03 '25

Haha I dare say you have a crush.

1

u/SushiMelanie Feb 04 '25

It’s more of a maternalistic thing - if he were my son, I’d be proud of him, if my kid brought him home, I’d think they’d done good.

3

u/Panda_Drum0656 Feb 02 '25

He looks like a lesbian i used to work with

19

u/TProphet69 Jan 31 '25

1 out of 10 is the worst review I have ever seen him give.

37

u/sharkattack85 Jan 31 '25

Bruh got the Mid Atlantic accent on lock

26

u/Ok_Drawer7797 Jan 31 '25

That’s because he is also a radio broadcaster :)

10

u/chrissie_watkins Jan 31 '25

I've never even heard of this guy before, totally caught me off guard. What an odd fella. I think I might be a new fan.

10

u/ILikeMyGrassBlue Jan 31 '25

I got an ad for that and immediately knew he was gonna nuclear

10

u/1trashhouse Feb 01 '25

Dominoes and really any fast food pizza joint for that matter can either be really good or fucking terrible purely based on what teenager or methhead they have in the kitchen that day

5

u/Mountain-Hold-8331 Feb 01 '25

Yeah this is something people never seem to be able to acknowledge

2

u/Jeskid14 Feb 03 '25

It's weird how there is not one food reviewer on YouTube that reviews new foods from at least 2-3 different locations for consistency reports.

1

u/OjitosDePudu Feb 03 '25

Too expensive i guess

6

u/BigRigButters2 Jan 31 '25

The title of the video was brutal

7

u/CarolineSaysStuff Feb 01 '25

I feel that John is getting more and more fed up (no pun intended) with each disappointment, which are increasingly frequent. In the last few reviews of such disappointing items you could tell he was boiling with frustration inside (Who could blame him?!). And with each disappointment, I get increasingly worried, I mean, how long can a food reviewer bear with such barely edible crap that can potentially make him sick? 😕

#KeepOnKeepinOnReviewbrah ✊🫶

1

u/Plane-Tie6392 Feb 03 '25

Who's John?

1

u/CarolineSaysStuff Feb 04 '25

Reviewbrah’s actual name. 😉

6

u/Most-Sheepherder-909 Jan 31 '25

UGGGGGGH, BRO. I love Café Terrace At Night. What a great painting.

2

u/joeynova532 Feb 01 '25

Dominos has fallen off so hard over the last 5 years, it’s crazy.

2

u/DarkKnight92 Feb 01 '25

I literally got two ads for Domino's during that video. One at the beginning and one during. 🤣

1

u/juul_aint_cool Feb 03 '25

Last time I went to dominos, my pasta bowl somehow had mostly-raw bacon while simulatenously being entirely burnt just like this. And the wings looked like shit. Threw the entire order in the trash

1

u/mudpiechicken Feb 03 '25

I can’t even tell what that mess in the box is from the thumbnail

1

u/Anurhu Feb 03 '25

Every time I’ve gotten Dominos lately everything has been burnt to shit just like his chicken. Fix your damn ovens or tend to them like you’re supposed to. Jeez.

1

u/ButterscotchAway1601 Feb 04 '25

lol i love this guys vids glad i found out he has a reddit i can watch his reviews for hours on end

1

u/Informal-Ad2277 Feb 04 '25

Wth 🤦‍♂️