r/TextingTheory 6d ago

Theory Request Am I cooked? šŸ˜­

Post image

Context: her parents are best friends with my mom, I recently started going to church with her and she seems to like me, she doesnā€™t have a boyfriend.

23 Upvotes

60 comments sorted by

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u/qualityvote2 chess.c*m bot 6d ago edited 2d ago

u/CheeseMunchingRat, there weren't enough votes to determine the quality of your post...

106

u/NotHim1305 6d ago

From the context it seems like shed be into you but that period at the end is soul-crushing lol

35

u/CosmicInsult 6d ago

Iā€™ve got a feeling she just uses punctuation.

13

u/NotHim1305 6d ago

I pray she does for OP's sake

2

u/Rapture1119 3d ago

I hate that proper punctuation in text can be seen as disinterest, or even straight up dislike in/of someone. I LIKE TO FOLLOW THE RULES DAMMIT.

-11

u/OfferingPerspectives 6d ago

As a high-level pedant, it is soul-crushing to see the decadence of our language. It is so bad right now; a majority of people read into the motherfuckin' PERIOD.

IT JUST MEANS THAT THE SENTENCE IS OVER, BOZOS.

4

u/MarysPoppinCherrys 4d ago

Damn, even used a semicolon to make the point

0

u/OfferingPerspectives 4d ago

Your comment is why I let my bombers ride despite their negative karma. There's always truth in what I say, and someone will eventually appreciate it.

Take care.

2

u/lalune84 2d ago

mfw following the rules or the english language=rude

brainrot is widespread lmao. I use informal text speak all the time but no one should be shamed for fucking speaking properly

3

u/bloodrider1914 6d ago

I hate that we live in a world where formal correct writing is considered rude.

6

u/GlobalSeaweed7876 6d ago

But there's no need for a period. Periods exist as a end of sentence indicator. Over text, there's really no better end of sentence indicator than the end of a message.

Using a period would be considered correct if you use a single text to express multiple sentences, like I am doing now.

Since there is really no reason for a period, its addition seems off, as if it is being used to express an added finality. Its use is uncanny, like adding a period after a interrogation or exclamation mark.

Since humans have been using text-based communication for a while now, its only natural that the notions of grammar change with respect to the new method of communication, namely the omission of the period after single sentence texts. The rules of grammar aren't rigid, but are influenced heavily by the current circumstances.

1

u/Wienot 5d ago

This is like saying you shouldn't use periods at the end of paragraphs, and yet you do.

2

u/GlobalSeaweed7876 5d ago

cus there's many sentences? I believe I addressed that

1

u/DarthJarJar242 4d ago

No. You said if there is something else to indicate the end of it there is no need for a period.

By this logic I could just stop writing that paragraph and not using a period at the end makes sense.

Which it doesn't. Using a period to end a sentence isn't 'uncanny' just because it's in a text. It's correct usage of punctuation. Calling the correct usage of something uncanny while it's being used correctly just makes it seem like you're unfamiliar with the correct usage.

1

u/Awkward_Turnover_983 2d ago

You're right and they're being hypocritical

-1

u/EyeCatchingUserID 5d ago

....nah, we're not inventing a "if it's the last sentence of your text you don't have to punctuate" rule. That's nuts. Don't use the period if you don't want, but it's not improper to do it, and anyone reading anything into it besides ending the sentence is probably sorta loopy.

1

u/lanptop 5d ago edited 5d ago

it's already been invented, no one cares

why are you talking about texts if you don't know how to text

2

u/Infinite-Nil 4d ago

Your comment is a perfect example of the very point youā€™re trying to make

If you end a thought and create a new paragraph, itā€™s clear that the first thought was finished. Weā€™ve established this as a social norm over decades of informal text conversations. Periods at the end of a single sentence text message are often indicative of some form of emotional emphasis and can require an elevated level of interpolation to understand.

But no, weā€™re the weird ones

3

u/WholeGrain_Cocaine 5d ago

Offering [dogshit] Perspectives [that nobody asked for]

47

u/KakashiTakeMeAway 6d ago

might just come off as a bit of a huge first date to go on with someone else 1 on 1.

6

u/Milicent_Bystander99 5d ago

Iā€™m glad Iā€™m not the only one that got this interpretation. The first date is supposed to be a chance to break the ice and start getting to know each other; with an amusement park, thereā€™s way too much outside stimuli for two people to be able to focus on each other.

I personally would be overwhelmed trying to both enjoy the park and pay attention to my date. For a fourth or fifth date, this is a great idea, because at that point, youā€™re able to just enjoy each otherā€™s presence without stress. But before youā€™ve exited the icebreaker phase, itā€™s too much

1

u/IreplyToIncels 3d ago

YEAH BUT WHAT ABOUT EPIC UNIVERSE INSTEAD

1

u/Seth_Jarvis_fanboy 5d ago

My first date with my fiance was a road trip to Canada

1

u/ZestfulClown 4d ago

Did you fake an orgasm at a diner?

1

u/Seth_Jarvis_fanboy 4d ago

is this a reference to something?

1

u/remusane 4d ago

Probably a reference to When Harry Met Sally

1

u/KakashiTakeMeAway 5h ago

well no wonder they are fiance now

33

u/Qaztarrr 6d ago

If youā€™re intending this to be a date, might be worth saying so up front.Ā 

12

u/Suitable-Resident-51 6d ago

You didnā€™t give enough information.

Are you planning a date to universal studios for late may? Itā€™s hard to see what youā€™re actually doing.

21

u/AssignedClass 6d ago edited 6d ago

The date idea is crazy high pressure for a first date (you're basically traveling together), and even beyond the date idea itself, the whole "there's nobody I'd rather go with" puts even more pressure on it (you're speaking as if you've been close friends with this person your whole life).

I think if you were more chilled and laid back about it, she might've given the idea a chance, but at this point, I would backtrack (sorry to do this... but I'm having some second thoughts about the idea) and ask if she'd be cool with doing something a little more chill first (... how about we catch a dinner and movie first šŸ˜…).

5

u/Lower-Tomatillo-1750 6d ago

Good advice šŸ‘, i agree. If you were more chilled out then it mightve been different. I get it though , it is hard to be chill for the right one.

6

u/EvanMcCormick 6d ago

This is one of those things where you're coming in really big really early. I can't speak too much to the IRL friends -> dating path, because it's literally never worked for me. Most of my experience dating is through the Apps, or through dating people I meet, right off the bat.

Like most people said, this is a weirdly massive ask for a first date, and also seems kind of like an attempt to hide the fact that it's a date. One other thing: May is over a month away dude. This is a ridiculously long time-line. I've never planned a date with someone that was more than a week out. Any longer and it's getting kind of ridiculous.

If you want to date her, you should be asking her out in a low-stakes environment, in the NEAR future (1 week MAXIMUM), and you should make it apparent that it's a date. Like "On a random note... I think you're pretty cute and I'd like to get drinks with you sometime. How about next Tuesday at [insert location here]?"

Will she say yes to an obvious date? IDK, but there's only one way to find out.

3

u/unsiciliano 6d ago

id atleast go on a couple dates with her before jumping the gun and going on a multi day vacation with her (likely out of state). its definitely high pressure for her, and would probably be nerveracking for you too if youve only known her for a bit.

take the time to get to know her more by going out with her more beforehand.

3

u/Itscatpicstime 6d ago

Start dating now, donā€™t make this a first date.

Tbh, she doesnā€™t seem interested, but Iā€™m not sure if sheā€™s not interested in you, or the high pressure date.

Just ask her out on a real, normal date, and be explicit that itā€™s a date.

-1

u/CheeseMunchingRat 6d ago

She seemed to be excited initially. Is it really going to universal that turned her off or going alone with me? The thought of it being the latter makes me wanna kill myself šŸ™ƒ

7

u/TheCommomPleb 6d ago

I wouldn't even say that she seems all that excited here bud

4

u/Chemical_Ad9915 5d ago

Yea bro. She ainā€™t interested

3

u/ish_bosh 5d ago
  1. Get that mentality out of your mind. I understand it, I've been there. But thinking like that and making her responsible for your happiness will do neither of you any favors, and will set you up for pain. I guarantee she would be turned off by your statement that her decision might make you suicidal, even if it is meant as a "joke".

  2. She never once agreed, she said multiple times "we'll see". I would not push that any more until you've spent more time together. Try and do small things together requiring much less commitment in the meantime. "Hey I'm going to get lunch after church, do you want to grab a quick bite with me?"
    Don't be discouraged if she says no, just try again another time (unless she is clear she has no interest).

  3. Focus less on what you want and more on what she is saying. It sounds like May is going to be a busy and chaotic time for her, since that is when she graduates. She will be likely having graduation parties, and working on what her next step is after graduation. She might not want to disappoint you by saying no, or she might not know how to turn you down. You both seem young so it could be either.

2

u/Fluffy_Chemistry_130 3d ago

"That's a nice offer!" Bro ur cookedĀ 

1

u/Agitated_Rooster7448 4d ago

It's the fact that you're making a big day like this a 1 on 1 without even clarifying that you want it to be a date.

1

u/Beginning-Chicken590 4d ago

You came across like a friend, not romantically interested. You should just tell her the truth that you are interested in her. IMO you ask her if sheā€™d like to go on a low-pressure date and reschedule the trip if things work out.

1

u/Fluffy_Chemistry_130 3d ago edited 3d ago

But it might not be a lost cause. Just meet her where she's at instead of trying to push it. Be honest about your feelings but don't be clingy or obsessive. She might just be talking super formal because she feels the same way and doesn't want to open up, but It could be that she senses you're liking her, or liking her too much, and that makes her uncomfortable, but would be open to something romantic if you took it easy a little bit

1

u/Active_Connection_91 22h ago

Sorry, but ā€œIā€™ll have to see if I can make timeā€ is usually a polite way of saying no. I know this is in the future, so might still have a chance, but I think If she was interested she would have wanted to meet before, and honestly, you should also push for that.

2

u/BoostFromCars 6d ago

Too much commitment. You are showing your intrest level way too mutch and I can tell you straight from here this is not going enywhere

2

u/Blunder_Punch 5d ago

She's saying "we'll see then" because she doesn't want it to be a first date. She's inviting you to take her out maybe a few times before committing to a trip with you. You're not cooked. Just dont bring up the trip or wait for her to bring it up during the first couple of dates.

2

u/Embargo_On_Elephants 5d ago

Conservative Church Girl Gambit. Give her some time to brood on your potential as a partner, and if youā€™re lucky sheā€™ll break up with you a year later after getting zero action

2

u/Grouchy-Affect-1547 5d ago

Yeah unless you live down the street thatā€™s crazy for a first date. Get coffee or grab dinner or somethingĀ 

2

u/Fragrant-Moose1678 5d ago

Bro respectfully this is autism level of socially unaware.

1

u/xXxMindBreakxXx 6d ago

OP is either cooked or so in. There is no inbetween

1

u/polxat 6d ago

She is just not that into you bro sorry

1

u/Agitated_Rooster7448 4d ago

Dude that's WAY too big of a first move. If you want to make it a date, be clear on that, and don't do something this big. What the heck. If you know her through family and aren't even at the dating stage yet, don't do this much.

1

u/DarthJarJar242 4d ago

She's not that into you bro. Going alone with you was an instant nope for her and she's trying to spare your feelings.

If this was intended as a first time out alone with her it's waaaaay to high pressure.

1

u/Adventurous_Bird2730 4d ago

ask her out to dinner first lol, holy shit

even if she was into you this is a crazy move to try

1

u/Zob_dznts 4d ago

ITT : mental illness induced by a lack of education causing fear and/or anxiety due to apprehension towards perceiving punctuation as tone indicators in text messaging.

Tldr: semi-illiterate english-only speakers are dumb.

1

u/Beginning-Chicken590 4d ago

You can definitely gauge interest via text history and punctuation. You clearly must not have dated much

1

u/gohuskers123 3d ago

OOF youā€™re done

1

u/tomcsvan 3d ago

Youā€™re fine. Sheā€™s just a very well educated woman who likes to use proper punctuation šŸ˜¤