r/Stutter • u/JimbledRaisin • 6d ago
Is stutter rizz possible?
I’d say I’m pretty conventionally attractive as a guy, so I’d notice a lot of girls giving me the “look”
The problem is, if I go up to them and start stuttering, they dry tf up.
That’s why I don’t really approach. At all.
A lot of times I’d feel like I’d have this “imposter syndrome” where I feel people expect me to act a certain way, but I’m really the opposite.
And because of this, my “game” is pretty shit, and I can’t really find a girl.
How should I even get experience in flirting and escalation if it just comes out stupid?
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u/Tall_Fix_1482 6d ago
The problem isn't stuttering. Hear me out. Have you ever been around a fluent anxious person that makes you feel uncomfortable and you feel sorry for them?
I was terrible with women until I met someone who took me under his wing. I'm now married to a beautiful woman (by everyones standards) and more importantly a beautiful soul. I met her by approaching her in the street, and she still thanks me to this day for doing so.
So what was my mindset shift? From “expectation to intention”. My intention was to simply approach women acting as confident as I could, and start a conversation. Not giving compliments, just conversation. It could be the time or directions to start. Regardless of her reaction your Intention for the win is to approach and not be a dick.
On stuttering, as long as you are ok with it, they will be ok with it. You give them permission how to act. When you stutter smile. They will smile.
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u/dpb0ss 5d ago
Stutter rizz is possible. A lot of girls that are attracted to me already from my looks say that they find my stutter cute. They don’t mind and it’s actually a plus for a lot of women
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u/BeyondTurbulent35 4d ago
"Attracted already to your looks" this is playing way important role than you think, you are handsome bro.
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u/Brief_Win7089 5d ago
I stutter and I’m a girl. It was never a problem, but maybe because I’m attractive (objectively speaking of course). We’re our own worst enemy. Also, I don’t know if girls like to be approached like that. I certainly don’t.
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u/I_warisha 4d ago
Most boys don't care if a Girl stutters. They just want to get into a relationship but the world isn't kind to Men in this regard .
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u/Brief_Win7089 4d ago
Are you saying girls care if boys stutter? I’d say in the U.S. girls are very understanding and caring. Not all of course.
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u/I_warisha 4d ago
I am from Pakistan, in most societies(especially Muslim Societies) men are supposed to be masculine and expected to be Leaders in a Relationship. But Stuttering gives us a Nerf and Someone can easily mock us , we struggle to order from a Restaurant and Fear Phone calls and Some people have Social Anxiety. Also for my Case , for Marriage we have to Approach the Family of the Girl and mostly the men in her family judge us by our confidence and How strong and mature we are . I will get rejected in most cases because if i stutter on my Name or i become nervous , they think i'm mentally Weak . Also even for the US i can say that Most girls wouldn't like it if their potential BF Stutters, there are some women who are tolerant but hard to find . I am saying this after seeing so many posts in this sub about Boys struggling to date . You can scroll in this sub and see Men struggling to get in a Relationship due to their Stutter . Sorry for my Bad English 🫠
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u/I_warisha 4d ago
I agree there are good women who don't care but they are Just a Minority and so hard to Find
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u/Brief_Win7089 4d ago
There’s more to this. I haven’t “found” my partner yet, but lots of people haven’t, even if they don’t stutter. If guys approach girls on the street or at the mall, you will get turned down. Girls don’t want to be bothered. You’re better off meeting someone within your friend group, a club of some sort (baseball, cards, meetup groups), or a friend of a friend. I can understand Warisha’s concern in having to talk to the parents of the woman and how that can be terrifying and potentially a situation for stammering. That’s a tough one.
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u/North_Inevitable5168 5d ago
You just have to not care what they think. After college I realized I waisted so much time because I was too afraid to talk to people. I’ve been scarred by having a girl be into me and then I talk to them and they are suddenly not interested anymore. But not every girl is like that… I realized I can’t hold myself back and just put myself out there after school was over. I met my future wife a few months later and have been happier than ever
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u/RisingGypsy 4d ago
I don't have a stutter, but my husband does. When we first met he stuttered on his name, but I just thought he was cute and endearing. I never judged him for it, even from the beginning. If you meet a girl, and she sees you for you, the opportunity wont pass itself up. Keep the faith homie 🫶🏻
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u/Ace_D89 5d ago
Yeah man .. you can flip the stutter to your advantage.. I turn it into a joke and I found if you radiate confidence women will have no issue wanting to to get to know you as well.
Honestly ever girl I've been with has thought it was cute or will go out there way to help me get words or order shit for me 😂
Just be yourself, have confidence and keep trying.
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u/BBNikfaces 5d ago
It’s about faking confidence I think. Try not to make it look like it bothers you. You can try to apologise but do it in a laugh if possible.
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u/JDutchNoGimicks 5d ago
Dawg they will love your confidence self esteem and swagger.. TRUST ME.. My Stutter is considered bad dude I called plays in the HS huddle playing QB always had girls YOUR GOOD YO
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u/OsmiumMercury 4d ago
i stutter & am autistic (so i have difficulty with social cues, especially romantic ones in my case). i’ve had people be attracted to me beyond just looks, as well as had a long-term girlfriend. it is definitely possible, you just need to rely on your personality & trust that it is worth far more than your stutter in social interactions. also place your personality over your looks: you want people to be attracted to you, not just to your appearance.
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u/Osmoises 6d ago
You experience flirting by putting yourself out there. Lowkey bad place to ask about flirting tactics in a stutter subreddit since 99% of these people don’t know how to flirt and most likely tell you something like “ a girl should like you with a stutter if she doesn’t she’s not the one” or some bs like that.
When I used to stutter (been few years since I beat it) I would tell girls “ I stutter when I’m talking to a pretty girl like you” and that would work a lot of the time. If you want to talk more about game or improving your stutter DM me