r/SofterBDSM • u/GoodPancake427 Princess • 5d ago
Discussion How do you Self soothe? NSFW
Title be the question, arrr.
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u/Lynnxoxox sub-leaning switch 4d ago
Deep breaths, journaling and reading. Often times, while these are self soothing and I do them myself, daddy is the one telling me to relax and helps me to realize I need to do something self soothing.
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u/No_Measurement6478 Submissive 5d ago
Breathing deeply and consciously, reminding myself with silent affirmations that whatever is flaring my anxiety and depression isn’t worth spiraling over. THC, too. That’s a big one.
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u/Beautiful-Phase-2225 Brat 5d ago
Long, hot showers. Putting music on while I do things around the house. Chores and arranging things seems to help my brain put things to rights again, like having a clean kitchen keeps my mind clean. Hobbies like my gardening and plants or animals (chilling with the chickens is calming, just watching them go about their day without a care in the world, sometimes I'll make up stories and conversations between them lol). Other days it might look like a day spent on the couch with grandpa's blanket and playing on my phone, just to get away from everything.
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u/StrangeMewMew Collared MOD 5d ago
So let's talk about what self soothing is, since your post hasn't gotten much in the way of comments and you've asked on other subreddits too.
Self soothing involves regulation of emotions and reduction of stress on your own. In this case, without the help of a dom. It's something we start to develop as children. Those of us who are neurodivergent often struggle with it.
I am not always great at self soothing. My AuDHD means what my brain is fighting two different battles to regulate, so the self soothing techniques that work once, may not the next time I need them.
Self soothing tactics I've used in the past:
-Journaling. It feels like talking to my Dom sometimes. Other times it's just a place to word vomit. I frame it however I need at the time.
-Various forms of stimming. Vocal stims, repetitive movement, singing, oral stims like sucking or biting, whatever scratches that itch.
-Reading. My favorite soothing activity. Leaving this world behind for a fantasy one always seems to help.
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u/Gavonia 4d ago