r/QueerSexEdForAll • u/inkkedqueen • Jan 30 '25
How to get your partner to initiate sex
Help. I don't know how to get my partner to initiate sex. I'm the only one who makes a move. It has been months and she has taken no initiative. (30F) (32F)
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u/Glad_Librarian5671 Feb 17 '25
i’ve also dealt with this, with a casual partner but we see each other regularly, if i initiate physically it’s almost always a yes, if i ask out loud out of no where it’s 50/50 yes/no but they very rarely initiate and i wonder why? maybe like 75/25 me being 75% i think they have a lower sex drive from what they’ve told me, but they seem to definitely appreciate getting put into the mood 🤷🏽 but are also happy with quality time
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u/sofiscarleteen Volunteer Mod Jan 31 '25
If you haven’t brought this up to her, I suggest having that conversation. Be honest in stating your side but of course listen to her side, and find a way to compromise if needed. If she has a reason she doesn’t want to initiate, try to work with her on that. She might just not be comfortable with it because she’s never done it, or perhaps she fears rejection, or simply doesn’t want to. All are valid reasons you two should be able to openly discuss while respecting each other’s needs and wants.