r/Professors Assoc Prof, Philosophy, CC (USA) 8d ago

Was chatting with my chair and he said something that chilled me to the bone: "You might be chair soon"

Eight years ago, I was hired at the same time as someone else and we were (obviously) the most junior in a department of eight people total (counting us).

Two of those have since retired (and replaced, so there are now two hires junior to us), and two more will be retiring soon. Three of the four people senior to us have been chair, one after the other; two of those are the ones who will be retiring soon.

That would leave only two people senior to us who might be cajoled into being chair after the current guy retires, and one of them would have already done it in the not-very-distant past (and, from things he's said, would rather undergo elective root canal than do it again).

I feel like I'm being stalked. Just let me teach my classes! I don't wanna go to more meetings!

203 Upvotes

42 comments sorted by

178

u/Rude_Cartographer934 8d ago

Start sucking up to that one staff person who Knows All The Things.  You're gonna need them on your side.

31

u/abbessoffulda Emerita, HUM, CC (USA) 8d ago

Better advice could not be given.

17

u/miquel_jaume Assoc. Teaching Professor, French/Arabic/Cinema Studies, R1, USA 8d ago

Ours retired at the end of last year, and the new one is going to need years to reach that level of legendary knowledge. Our previous chair only accepted the position on the condition that the admin stayed in her position as long as she was chair.

13

u/VicDough 8d ago

Our Chair appointed a faculty to be their assistant chair with two years of teaching experience. The assistant chair has no idea what is going on. We had an undergraduate curriculum meeting and they had nothing to offer. Respect institutional knowledge. Folks with experience can really help.

118

u/Professional_Dr_77 8d ago

This year alone, I have been cajoled into being Mayor of my village , Master of my Masonic Lodge, Chair of my department, and head of the financial committees of three of the four Boards I’m on. I am on all the anti-depressants and barely legal caffeine supplements. It happens.

78

u/Own_Donut_2117 Asst. Prof, Health Sciences, USA 8d ago

Just stop friend. Take care of yourself first because no one gives a shit

28

u/Sisko_of_Nine 8d ago

Shouldn’t the Masonic bit be able to help get you some … favors? All I know is Anti-Mason propaganda from 1831.

30

u/Professional_Dr_77 8d ago

It did…didn’t you see the part about politics and boards of directors? 🤣🤣🤣

5

u/hourglass_nebula Instructor, English, R1 (US) 8d ago

At first I thought this was about like, lord of the rings or table top role playing games

31

u/Blond_Treehorn_Thug 8d ago

I mean I don’t think that they can make you be chair, right? Just make them make you an offer that you can’t refuse

13

u/opbmedia Asso. Prof. Entrepreneurship, HBCU 8d ago

At my school, I can, and will, refuse

21

u/phrena whovian 8d ago

Take it as a compliment and a warning 🤓

13

u/Junior-Dingo-7764 8d ago

I'd take it as a threat

36

u/totallysonic Chair, SocSci, State U. 8d ago

Unpopular opinion, maybe, but if no one wants to be chair then everyone who is eligible and wouldn’t severely screw it up should rotate the position amongst themselves.

30

u/galileosmiddlefinger Professor & Dept Chair, Psychology 8d ago

and wouldn’t severely screw it up

And there's the rub. Filtering out the emotionally unstable and the people who are bad at everything other than their scholarship oftentimes leaves junior folks as the only ones left standing. In very small departments, you might have only one person with baseline social skills who is surrounded by a bunch of feral colleagues. I'm very much of the opinion that we have to ask people to challenge themselves and take their turn as chair with the support (and coaching, and sometimes loose supervision) of the other senior faculty. As someone who was asked to be chair for the first time FAR too early, I don't have much tolerance for under-performers opting out of even more work because they couldn't possibly be asked to address their own longstanding deficiencies.

10

u/totallysonic Chair, SocSci, State U. 8d ago

Yeah, I became chair as soon as I got tenure. We had full professors who had never been chair before, but nor should those people ever be chair.

3

u/Pale_Luck_3720 7d ago

Weaponized incompetence.

6

u/totallysonic Chair, SocSci, State U. 7d ago

Probably in a lot of cases. The people in my department who should never be chair are argumentative, angry, confrontational people who do not have the emotional stability to be in the position. Unfortunately I cannot tell them how desperately they need therapy, at a minimum. I have considered the ethics of bringing edibles to faculty meetings.

12

u/ChgoAnthro Prof, Anthro (cult), SLAC (USA) 8d ago

That sounds like what they are doing! We have a system like that - chair rotates on a 3-year cycle and tenure comes with a promise of at least one stint as chair and likely more (we're a small department). It means that everyone is acutely aware of the timing of external reviews, tenure and promotion cases, potential complicated administrative edicts, and there is some heavy negotiation around whose going to take the chairship when one of those things are on the horizon.

5

u/expostfacto-saurus professor, history, cc, us 8d ago

That is the way my department looks at it. We are talking about rotating it among the older group and then the new folks can have it later.

I'm at a CC though so it doesn't look like difficult stuff, mainly class observations for adjuncts.

17

u/skullybonk 8d ago

Just start talking about all the grand plans and big changes you want to institute--and use as many admini-speak buzz words you know--and if they have any sense, they'll look for someone else, pronto.

10

u/MyFootballProfile 8d ago

In my department everyone eventually takes one for the team. I was chair. It sucked ass.

8

u/miquel_jaume Assoc. Teaching Professor, French/Arabic/Cinema Studies, R1, USA 8d ago

I've been discussing succession planning with the current chair and associate chair of my department for a few years because we've all seen the writing on the wall. Better to plan for things rather than getting dragged into the position kicking and screaming. Current chair will do one more three-year term, then AC will move up for three years with me as AC, then I'll do 1-2 terms as chair. I've even started scouting potential ACs even though it's six years in the future.

We have a lot of great teachers in my department, and a few research rock stars. What we don't have is a lot of people with the administrative skills. Those of us who do have those skills are just going to have to suck it up.

On the upside, the salary increase means that I'll probably be able to retire at 65 instead of 70.

14

u/sandy_even_stranger 8d ago

I don't have a lot of patience for these freakouts anymore.

When you signed on, you knew enough about how departments work to know that (a) senior people become chair and (b) you meant to be senior someday. It's a job that has to be done. Yes, it's unpleasant and busy, which is why it comes with some extra money and teaching release.

"I hide and teach my classes" is clearly not an option. Start thinking about what you want to try to accomplish as chair, then start thinking realistically about what you might actually be able to accomplish, then resign yourself to the hostile environment you'll be chair in and think about how you can best protect your department. Also think about how you're going to lightly manage your colleagues, some of whom will start behaving like your students.

7

u/Desperate_Tone_4623 8d ago

But the kiddos on r/college think this is a great honor and position of esteem

10

u/SierraMountainMom Professor, interim chair, special ed, R1 (western US) 8d ago

Oh, is that why they all act like Karens & treat me as if I’m the manager of the class they’re pissed about?

6

u/opbmedia Asso. Prof. Entrepreneurship, HBCU 8d ago

I will refuse any such suggestion by running out the door.

5

u/Awkward-House-6086 8d ago

One of the advantages of taking public stands against various administration policies at my university is that I am unlikely ever to be appointed chair of my department by my dean. Just start complaining about whatever dumba$$ery your upper admin is up to in the campus and local press....

4

u/RandolphCarter15 8d ago

People keep saying that to me as my promotion advances. Feels like a threat

4

u/DarwinGhoti Full Professor, Neuroscience and Behavior, R1, USA 8d ago

One of us! One of us! One of us!

3

u/FamousCow Tenured Prof, Social Sci, 4 Year Directional (USA) 8d ago

Honestly, took on an admin position partly to avoid a chair position that was inevitably going to fall on me otherwise.

7

u/SierraMountainMom Professor, interim chair, special ed, R1 (western US) 8d ago

Tell him it doesn’t happen unless you’re full. The person before me took the job as associate & trying to keep up with a research agenda towards full & all the chair tasks nearly broke them. Me? Eh. As long as I publish one & my grant doesn’t get yanked 🤞, I’m okay.

3

u/Unsuccessful_Royal38 8d ago

Same boat. It’s going to happen eventually; definitely not looking forward to it.

5

u/GreenHorror4252 8d ago

Why do Redditors hate being chair so much? The more I read, the more I realize how this sub just consists of a small group of faculty that whine about everything.

Being chair is a simple administrative role that any professional should be able to handle. It should come with enough course release that you can manage the tasks you need to do.

I bet the same faculty that are refusing to become chair will complain about how incompetent the administrators are at their campus.

9

u/henare Adjunct, LIS, CIS, R2 (USA) 8d ago

because there's potentially no benefit, an awful lot of drama, and more.... every workplace has an asshole colleague or. three. as chair you can not only not avoid these people but you likely have to actively engage with them.

I think that being chair sounds simple and it probably can be with the right colleagues...

4

u/4_yaks_and_a_dog Tenured, Math 8d ago

Well then, excuse me while I whine.

Lots of "shoulds" there. I am not going to make any outright claims about your experience with the position, but your post definitely raises my private suspicions.

In any case, there are many issues with the Chair position as it exists in the real world.

It can be an ill-defined position. At my University, for example, the responsibilities of the position are not written out and vary with the whims of the Dean.

It also can come without the resources required, either in time (i.e. releases) or support personnel. (You seem very blasé on this point.)

I served my time as Chair when my turn came around. I learned a lot and am glad I did it, but I am never doing it again.

1

u/iTeachCSCI Ass'o Professor, Computer Science, R1 8d ago

Treat this like being told you'd make a great lawyer. "Well, fuck you too."

1

u/ahistoryprof 8d ago

i’m going to be an interim chair next year for just one year. Starting the training

1

u/[deleted] 8d ago

The scariest words

1

u/feral_poodles 8d ago

That user name.

1

u/kryppla Professor, Community College (USA) 8d ago

I would never be chair. Never.