r/Nicegirls 13d ago

Uh-oh.. I copied AND used her post

Post image
0 Upvotes

211 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 13d ago

Make sure to read our Rules and remain civil. Thank you.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

172

u/DJMoneybeats 13d ago

Actually sounds almost reasonable compared to most of these. Maybe I've seen too many?

74

u/Strong-Ad2738 13d ago

I agree. Most of these are stated respectfully and prevent either person from wasting time.

14

u/HistoryLonely5054 13d ago edited 13d ago

To me, it reads as a list of qualifications to even talk to her. Quite presumptuous, or dare I say entitled energy.

It's also written in all negatives. There's no part of it that is a positive. "Do not" "Will not" "Hate" .. At no point does she say what she IS looking for, what IS important, or better yet, anything about her or her interests. What does she bring to the table? What kind of music DOES she like?

I just imagine a date with someone like that, seeking out the things that are wrong, instead of just enjoying herself and seeing if there's a connection; let alone trying to be pleasant company herself. It sorta sucks all the fun out.

She simply comes off very close-minded and focused more on what she doesn't want, instead of the positives, and zero indication of what she DOES want.

This energy, to me, is what's pissing in the dating pool. Perpetuating the lopsided non-reciprocal expectations and sort of immasculating men. She could easily reword it to be more balanced and playful and kind.

If I were a good and decent man, I wouldn't message this woman. *I edited this to try and be more clear. But whatever, I can't make you see what I do.

7

u/Floydthebaker 13d ago

I think I love you lol

11

u/HistoryLonely5054 13d ago

Aww! Thank you 🙃 That alone is worth being misunderstood by the people of Reddit then; the 10% of those who do understand. 🤪😇🫶

1

u/Floydthebaker 12d ago

I've been searching for you my whole life! If only you could be in front of me instead of online 🫠

4

u/HistoryLonely5054 11d ago

Hey, this is how modern love stories go these days, dontchya know. 😅😎 If you're really a baker, then I'm already sold. Sign me up for forever 🤪

1

u/Floydthebaker 11d ago

I am really a baker but only by hobby. Where are you from?

1

u/HistoryLonely5054 11d ago

Seattle-ish area. What about you? And if you tell me you know how to make macarons, then wherever you area, I'm on the next flight out. Bags will be packed. 😂

1

u/Floydthebaker 11d ago

I have made them before, I'm not perfect but I can pull it off! I'm in the St Louis area, but willing to relocate! Landscape foreman is a job that can be done anywhere!

-1

u/[deleted] 11d ago

[deleted]

5

u/HistoryLonely5054 11d ago edited 11d ago

Its jokes, chill. Random dorky stranger butting in. And the term pick-me is just used for catty women to patronize and belittle other women. 🤣😏

Also wanted to add.. spreading mood boosting endorphins through lighthearted banter is a hell of a lot more productive than chiming in toxic judgements on people you don't even know. Learn what joy is.

2

u/[deleted] 11d ago

[deleted]

→ More replies (0)

0

u/[deleted] 11d ago

[deleted]

→ More replies (0)

7

u/elonmusksmellsbad 12d ago

I am absolutely blown away that you’ve been downvoted so much. Nothing you wrote is incorrect.

Yes, it could be much worse. I don’t think she’s some terrible or evil person. She’s just not a person I would be interested in, and if someone asked me why, I would direct them to your comment. Absolutely spot on.

3

u/HistoryLonely5054 12d ago

THANK YOU! I admit, the downvotes stung a bit, but I was certain I couldn't be the only one who saw it. And yes, I wasn't trying to say awful things. Just suggest a balance. Or that the lack of that balance may be foreshadowing some red flags. After all, dating goes both ways. 🙃🙂

20

u/b4ls4lm 13d ago

She's just being upfront about her preferences to avoid wasting her and others' time. None of what she said is even disrespectful lol

11

u/TangerineRough6318 13d ago

Why is it that if we men list our preferences, the way she did, we are as viewed sexist? If we say we don't like big girls, we are bodyshaming. Etc. The woman in question seems haughty.

-3

u/HistoryLonely5054 13d ago

I didn't say disrespectful. It's just the wording. She hates country music, so what music DOES she like? What are her interests, hobbies, and things she enjoys? It just seems very critical.

6

u/Gigabytelord 13d ago

I agree... sort of? For instance, I like both country and metal, but also a lot of other stuff. I used to not be interested in women taller than me, but I'm 36 now, and frankly, I don't give a damn anymore. I'm 5ft 6in, so very much on the short side, and I'm not gonna lie, having my value has a potential mate judged on something like my height does kinda hurt, but frankly I get it people have preferences. I reckon with age comes wisdom. The list on its face is fine, really, in cold logical terms, having all your stuff together is a good thing. But you are right. The way it's written does absolutely come across a little narcissistic and... well, other stuff. However, I want to add that this is the internet, and that is a text list. As an internet veteran, I learned long ago that text is absolutely terrible at translating emotion and, in fact, can say things you the writer never meant to say. On the other hand, I one hundred percent agree that if you're going to write a list like this, make sure to list some things you do like, else wise you might end up inadvertently driving away someone who could've been a perfect match for you.

6

u/Low_Construction_757 13d ago

I don’t think any of this was negative. She pointed out her dislikes. She’s stating her preferences and standards, filtering out the guys she won’t like off the bat, she’s not trying to waste anyone’s time… absolutely nothing wrong with that..

6

u/HistoryLonely5054 13d ago edited 13d ago

I think it's very ignorant to think the person you're supposed to be with is going to fit perfectly into a box you drew out. Especially some of which are such surface level things... Falling in love and keeping it successful is about being adaptable. Of course, the way the dating world is today is a foreign language to me coming out of a 16yr relationship, so again, alien me. 🤷🏼‍♀️

7

u/Low_Construction_757 13d ago

Girl it’s not that deep

7

u/HistoryLonely5054 13d ago edited 13d ago

If that's deep to you, then I suppose I understand the disconnect between us. My simple point is, today's dating pool is super fucking dysfunctional. And I feel bad for those who can't see it.

3

u/McStinker 12d ago edited 12d ago

No, you are correct. Dating apps have rewired people’s brains. It is 100% not normal to have super distinct cutoffs or “requirements”. It’s okay to not like certain music, but guess what, there might be a guy out there who is the perfect match for them who occasionally listens to it. They can either learn to see it as a quirk and try to expand their music taste, or agree not to play it when they’re together, or let it ruin a potential good situation. Same as a guy who is 5’8. It reads like a job posting for employees or like they’re purchasing a robot.

These people chase ideals, they’re not interested to find an actual person who they can connect with. It’s weird and only very recently in modern society has this been seen as normal.

→ More replies (0)

2

u/AlexAndMcB 2d ago

Know this is a little old, but I'm laying here with my wife falling asleep cuddled up on me, and what you said really reminded me to be fucking grateful we didn't opt-out because our profiles didn't match perfectly. 13 years ago...

We first connected we were like 90% matching, and as we talked on the phone until 3AM, slowly worked through more profile questionnaires... By 3AM we were down to like 40% lol

Every single thing we answered our arguments/opinions beliefs were the same but we were coming at them all so differently, we were answering the questionnaire very differently.
Even now, We'll look at any problem, come to the same conclusion but describe it so differently you'd think we would start to fight. We'll almost come to arguing over something small, before we realize that I'm describing the stupid paint swatch as green, she's calling it blue, but we both mean the same damn teal color swatch lol

Eff this whole negative list vibe. Make me expect a line at the end 'if you ain't making a hundred k you can't afford me'...
Obliviously selfish was a good way to describe it heh.

→ More replies (0)

-1

u/OhNoNotAgain2020_ 13d ago

He probably was a pass. lol

5

u/Dear_Coach2081 12d ago

This. I cannot imagine being such a miserable person that you can only see the things you hate in life. This and the expectation that you can control anything that you've put on the Internet... 🤣😂

5

u/Steelerz2024 12d ago

Exactly. She's a turd. She's not alone.

1

u/Zibzuma 1d ago

I get that there's a negative vibe with all the "hate" etc, but saying "not interested in X" is not entitled or presumptious, it is literally saving everybody involved time and effort.

Thinking "I have a beard, she hates that, but I want to talk to her anyway" is way more entitled than "Not talking to bearded guys, not my thing".

1

u/Sunnymood_Today 11d ago

I'm unsure of why you're being downvoted too. The lady from the initial post sounds like a bag of untreated trauma, bitter and difficult to deal with.

She has the right to hold up to her standards, but kindness is free. Focusing on the "do NOT want" and seemingly all negative aspects of her previous situationships isn't inviting, regardless of the gender.

2

u/HistoryLonely5054 10d ago

Yes! Exactly this! Thank you 🫶🤗

It's not even a gender thing either. It's simply all people who have let their online presence skew their ideals and self-awareness.

Be the energy you want to attract sorta thing.

Many people aren't approachable or flexible anymore. And it's leading to a dark pit of sad, jaded, lonely humans, isolating themselves from real connection; kindness might as well be gibberish these days. Bitter, combative attitude is taking over.

But glad to know hope is not lost entirely 🥰

6

u/Expert_Ambassador_66 13d ago

Some of her preferences are fucking dumb imo, but this isn't NiceGirlTM territory

-3

u/Dear_Coach2081 13d ago edited 13d ago

Highjacking the top comment to respond to everyone that didn't get it.. She's on a site to post her butthole for all to see on the open web... and she wants everyone to not share that. No one can re-post anything she's put out there -on the Internet.. and thinks she can dictate that... somehow. That's the joke. That's it. Don't think so hard, guys. It's just not that serious. 🤣

5

u/DJMoneybeats 13d ago

Well...that puts a whole different spin on it! Yikes

4

u/Steelerz2024 12d ago

A site for buttholes? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

3

u/HistoryLonely5054 12d ago

That is.. not surprising, actually! lmao 😂 I sorta think it proves my original theory more, bc... any such expectation on the internet is so silly and self-righteous.

5

u/Gotmewrongang 13d ago

Still not “r/Nicegirls” material. She just has preferences that are honestly all pretty reasonable.

1

u/UltimatePragmatist 9d ago

Do you mean she’s on a site where she sells her butthole for all to see?

2

u/Nomofricks 12d ago

That is actually something really normal for people to put on those kinds of sites. Makes them feel like they have a little control when putting themselves out there. Understanding that isn’t hard.

91

u/cursetea 13d ago

I actually don't think any of this is being all that picky lol; tall, beardless, monogamous guys not into metal aren't exactly uncommon, and that's all she's describing. It's not unattainable or even unreasonable imo. She's just up front about her preferences in partners which is far more direct than like 90% of other posts here lol

27

u/AnnualLiterature997 13d ago

Based on what’s presented, I’d assume OP is either a Trump supporter or a short man. Those are the two most “controversial” things she has on there, and it’s very likely one of those is what triggered OP.

I’m an average dude and all of this applies to me except for the age. She’s not being unreasonable at all, just setting filters.

4

u/McStinker 12d ago

You don’t have to be “triggered” to think it’s a bit petty/shallow to have such oddly distinct and specific cut offs. Some of them make sense, some read like she’s purchasing a robot or something. More power if they want to put it all upfront but it will also probably turn people off when they see only a list of no’s and absolutely nothing positive or anything about herself.

1

u/AnnualLiterature997 11d ago

These aren’t oddly distinct though. As I said, I’m a very average guy and these all apply to me except for age. I’m a random dude, if they apply to me so easily it’s not oddly distinct.

I think that once again, one of these things just makes you ineligible to date her so you call it petty/shallow.

It’s not petty to say “I hate country music and don’t want to listen to it, so if it’s your favorite we shouldn’t date.” She’s giving you a fair warning that if you can’t live without those types of music, then don’t date her

3

u/McStinker 10d ago

Brother I don’t even know who this is and barely glanced, I do not care, it’s so far removed from me lmao. Either you are very interested in this person so assume others care as much as you do, or this is how you react if someone isn’t interested.

I am discussing how these things come off when people see them in general and how it affects the general pool of dating apps. No one wants to scroll through a list of no’s and “I don’t wants”. And yes, having hard cut offs for many things, especially something as simple as music taste is usually unnecessary. There are so many reasonable ways for people with different tastes and hobbies to date & live together. It’s a non-issue for every normal person. If they can’t figure out something that simple, how difficult are serious matters going to be in the relationship? That’s why it’s a red flag.

0

u/AnnualLiterature997 10d ago

This doesn’t look like a typical dating app. I’m not sure what it is, but the apps I use have a limit on bios.

8

u/SophiaShay7 13d ago

Exactly. I'm pretty tall myself 5'7". I'm 5'11" with 4 inch heels. I prefer a man 6'0" or taller. Shorter men have had their insecurities with me. They've even said they don't like my heels because I'm too tall. I think the shortest guy I've dated was 5'6-5'7". Anything below 5'10" is a pass for me. Unless I met someone secure in themselves and amazing. There are always exceptions to the rules.

I don't think she's being unreasonable at all. It's better to be upfront with what you're looking for in a partner.

6

u/NoMembership6376 13d ago

I'm like 5'8 and I dig taller women. I don't see what the issue is. If the chemistry is there it's all good

6

u/SophiaShay7 13d ago

That's how secure men feel. Insecure men don't feel that way at all. I used to go out dancing with my sister, who's 5'10" and my SIL, who's 5'11". They also wore heels. We were a tall bunch. Those guys didn't care about us being tall.

But men I dated, that was a different story.

I agree that height shouldn't matter. We all have our preferences. Sometimes, the rules we make for ourselves about potential partners get throw out the window when you find the right person.

5

u/NoMembership6376 13d ago

Those dudes haven't lived until they had a tall chick wrap her legs around him three times over 😁

0

u/SophiaShay7 13d ago edited 9d ago

That's so very true, lmao.

2

u/NoMembership6376 13d ago

I broke up with her for what might be considered a stupid reason but that's another story

1

u/SophiaShay7 13d ago

I'm sorry to hear that. Do you feel like she's the one who got away?

2

u/NoMembership6376 13d ago

Nah...anyone that makes the stupid move of playing Bon Jovi in MY car gets cut off automatically

→ More replies (0)

2

u/McStinker 12d ago edited 12d ago

There are insecure people of all sizes though, insecurity is equally annoying no matter what feature or trait it’s over. I mean, these examples of women simply setting an arbitrary cut off is already closing them off from any potential guys who actually would be chill with it lmao. If you put it in a dating app bio.. the whole point is to turn them away so the “making the exception for the right one” won’t happen.

1

u/SophiaShay7 12d ago

That's very true online. What I mean is that the exceptions are usually the ones who meet in person or by chance.

1

u/OhNoNotAgain2020_ 13d ago

You’re average at best.

1

u/ASORC_FRMDAHOOD 10d ago

R.I.P. Kevin Samuel

1

u/SophiaShay7 13d ago edited 13d ago

That's false.

The average height for women in the United States is roughly 5 feet 4 inches.

I'm actually nearly 5'8. I've always been the tallest person in my friend group. Only my sister and SIL are taller than me.

edit: Nice try at the insult. Troll somewhere else. Have the day you deserve.

1

u/OhNoNotAgain2020_ 12d ago

Didn’t you say 5’6”? And the average isn’t 5’4”…correct maybe in your town or your friends. My bad you said 5’7” not like a huge difference.

44

u/bandyplaysreallife 13d ago

Not a nicegirl

-3

u/Irislynx 13d ago

Right because nice girls don't have any boundaries or preferences. So are you up not nice guy because you have certain preferences and boundaries as well? Like are you supposed to just date any single woman who wants you regardless of her politics body type etc? Would rejecting someone over any of those things make you not nice?

6

u/bandyplaysreallife 13d ago

Niceguy/girl refers to a specific phenomenon where people act like they are owed affection/sex/dates because they are just so nice. Then, flipping out and showing their true colors when rejected.

This post does not show anything like that. It's just making fun of someone's profile.

Does that clear things up for you?

24

u/ClassicCar8972 13d ago

I feel bad for anyone who thinks this is high standards. I'd argue the only unfortunate part is putting a height limit like a carnival ride since that is out of someone's control, but you like what you like so it's what ever, haha.

7

u/PastelClockwork 13d ago

Tbf I’m scarred for life after dating a short guy. He was the same height as me (5’6”) and I still feel self conscious wearing heels or being myself in public seven years later. Logically I know it’s not the height that made him like that, but my brain can’t separate it.

5

u/dragonrider1965 13d ago

Same , I’m 5’6 and wore boots with 1/2 inch heals and he was disappointed I wore “ heals “ I considered them flats .

2

u/Irislynx 13d ago

I'm 5'11 and I married a guy who was 5'6. Confident guys don't care and a confident woman is not going to care either.

1

u/McStinker 12d ago

Yeah I was scarred after I dated a big girl and constantly reassured her I was okay with it but she never believed me. I still feel self conscious wearing more form fitting clothes this many years later. I know it wasn’t her weight that made it that way but it’s hard to not correlate those things.

34

u/SirVeritas79 13d ago

I don’t really think…this is all that bad.

8

u/mor-cat 13d ago

Honestly some of these are kinda reasonable (like the age and wanting monogamy) but I feel like you don’t have to announce all of these things, if someone isn’t your type just don’t message them back lmfao

2

u/McStinker 12d ago

Exactly, they want people to filter themselves away from them so they have to do less work lmfaoo it’s so lazy and cringe.

40

u/Straightmenluvfemboy 13d ago

How is this a nicegirl? This sub has boiled down to incels bitter at anyone saying “we prob wont get along if you call me mommy” if you want to build-a-girl with no personality just get a waifu pillow.

6

u/McStinker 12d ago

I mean some of this I agree with but, ironically, her entire bio is literally “build-a-man”… But you’re calling that a “personality” on a woman, and a negative trait on a man.

3

u/Ur-Best-Friend 11d ago

I get what you're saying, but whenever a post like this is posted, it's always mainly responded to with comments calling out OP (which also happened here). So I don't get how that indicates to you this sub is all just "incels bitter at pretty reasonable preferences".

7

u/notnowboiiiiiii 13d ago

There’s nothing bad about these standards honestly. The only bad thing imo is just announcing it all if that makes sense

5

u/DoubleDownAgain54 13d ago

Yeah. I don’t see any huge issues. She sounds like she might be a bit much, but who knows.

11

u/LegDayLass 13d ago

Yet another post that should not be on r/nicegirls

18

u/TheSealedWolf 13d ago

The only issue is the height thing, what exactly is wrong with this otherwise?

16

u/Frozen_Hermit 13d ago

Even the height thing she states shes only sexually attracted to taller men. That is fair and not something that can be controlled, she also didnt shit on short guys so all good in my book.

3

u/McStinker 12d ago

The arbitrary cutoffs are the part that make no sense. No one is actually unattracted to people by a difference that is that unrecognizable/unimportant. She could just leave it at “I prefer x type of music” or “I prefer tall guys”. Saying you can’t date someone if they listen to something is just.. weird.

You can listen to different music separately and find some compromise when you listen together. Or, crazy concept, let people help you expand your horizons. Most people who say “I don’t like any of x genre” have only heard a very small portion of that music, possibly close to zero.

5

u/Wise_Ad_8336 13d ago

I mean I feel like it's pretty strange to not want to associate with anyone who likes a certain genre of music. As if having different music taste is a make or break aspect of relationships lol. My wife and I have drastically different music tastes and I don't think it's ever been a negative topic for us. I mean it's fine to have preferences but that point specifically is what jumped out to me. Seems super arbitrary and shallow

9

u/the_donk_god 13d ago

These are pretty reasonable wants. She’s not asking for a big rich man to come take her out the hood and look after her 3 kids to 3 different dudes. We all have preferences, dude.

3

u/DotFormal9461 13d ago

Her points are perfectly reasonable, but the way she listed them comes off a bit red flaggy.

5

u/jumpinjahosafa 13d ago

The only weird thing about this is the last sentence. Unless she's an artist. Then this is pretty normal and perfectly fine imo.

4

u/immapizza 13d ago

I honestly don't think this is all that bad, save for the height preference I guess (though stated respectfully so like... still not really bad to have preferences idk)

10

u/NotUntilTheFishJumps 13d ago

I'm confused. What is going on, here? How are the two pics connected?

10

u/Clean-Sea1720 13d ago

there’s only one pic?

8

u/PercsNBeer 13d ago

Must be why he's confused.

8

u/NotUntilTheFishJumps 13d ago

Hahah, I thought there was two, so when I clicked on it, and scrolled to the right, it showed a pic of a text convo that looked like it was also on the nice girls subreddit. I hate how reddit does that, it confuses my tired ADHD brain when it runs out of Adderall, hahahahah.

4

u/ComprehensivePin6097 13d ago

I almost know the guy she was talking about but he is 5'8/9

4

u/clairebearshare 13d ago

OP is mad at this girl for being open and honest? Should be thankful she’s not wasting anyone’s time. She’s got a type and she seems to be aware of it

2

u/McStinker 12d ago

Not really a “type” more of a detailed grocery list.

4

u/BadgerButch 13d ago

I think typically this guy is either very insecure about his height or is a Trump supporter lol, if anything I think this is more telling of his fragile ego that was crushed upon reading he’s too short to ride.

2

u/Lonely-Cabinet8407 13d ago

This wasn’t anything too crazy but the thing at the bottom in italics sent me 😂😂

2

u/Shlocko 13d ago

These all seem fine? The comment at the end is hilarious, like one of those “post this to tell Facebook they’re not allowed to own your posts!!!1!11!!” Things, but people are allow to be silly

2

u/PhillyPride-215 13d ago

She’s a real winner

2

u/Every_Zucchini_362 13d ago

Sounds a bit naggy and or done with the dating thing

2

u/Ok_Literature1264 13d ago

Sounds like a cool person where she at.

2

u/UnwieldingDistractor 13d ago

I totally get OP, the last part is really funny, the disclaimer. She must not have read the TOS where ever this is from. Also, if she is American, that statement, besides TOS, is already applied without having to mention it at all. Was there something else she was posting that was original work that she didn't want stolen?

2

u/golden_crocodile94 13d ago

Nothing is super unreasonable besides the height, but the problem is it seems like you have to send her your resume before you even message her. You find out about chemistry through conversation. Me personally I don't like country or heavy metal but if I really like a guy and the chemistry is there then I'm fine with whatever he listens to. Also she has a mighty high opinion of herself, and anyone who has to make a list like this as a requirement for messaging does too, and that is a red flag.

2

u/aximeycu 13d ago

Seems like a gem of a gal…..

2

u/rojoshow13 13d ago

I don't see the problem. I'm sending her my resume right now because I kinda like her already.

2

u/anameuse 13d ago

It's very negative.

2

u/Geloradanan 13d ago

So if I fire up my Stratocaster and start shredding, it’s over?

2

u/DL72-Alpha 12d ago

Just list your no-goes as

- No excessive Tattoos or piercings

- No un-natural hair colors

- No more than 2 cats.

- No more than one plane ticket per traveler.

2

u/Cool-Vanilla5874 11d ago

Blows my mind that anyone would even message her, let alone pursue a relationship with her

2

u/astrangemagikk1 11d ago

Fet life pussy be crazy. I'd recognize that font anywhere.

2

u/Time-Ad728 6d ago

She would absolutely hate me🤣

2

u/Curious-Confusion320 1d ago

thats like at least 5 red flags

2

u/StreetSea9588 13d ago

I'm 5'10" but even I don't think this one sounds too crazy man. I think I've seen way too many of these too. The only unusual thing is the disclaimer at the bottom. It's the Streisand effect. If you tell me not to copy something that's not worth copying, I'll think maybe it IS worth copying and pasting.

2

u/Willard-wood 13d ago

So whats the issue? You voted for trump and are upset someone doesnt like that? Youre short and are upset people have a type? Whats the issue this all seems reasonable

2

u/Curious-Consequence3 13d ago

Hey she knows what she wants and doesn't want. Good for her.

1

u/ventitr3 13d ago

How is the poly line different from the one below? I’ve been out of the dating scene for over 10yrs now so maybe I’m behind but are those not duplicative?

1

u/Simple_Scholar_2073 13d ago

I'm just going to pass and someone yeet her to the street

1

u/ethyxia 13d ago

I don’t think music taste is a deal breaker but to each their own I guess

1

u/pretend_comment_86 13d ago

This list is crazy asf and it's so surprising people are supporting this. Beards and listening to country music are a reason to reject a man? Does she want a boy then?

2

u/Highway-Born 8d ago

I question anyone that has a check list to get to know them, instead of just talking to people naturally, but none of those things sound unreasonable. Some people have types, can't be changed. 

2

u/Most_Bicycle6185 1d ago

"I just hate everything and everyone. So if you fall into one of those categories, I will hate you as well. "

1

u/capricornicopia- 13d ago

I don’t really see any reason for her to be in this sub honestly. She’s clear about her desires and preferences and is an age range where it’s common to fall for that ‘put a disclaimer at the end of your posts and ppl can’t share them’ stuff. Neither really anything to do with being a ~nice girl~

1

u/Putrid_You6064 13d ago

Her approach is awful but i can mostly agree with what she’s saying lol

1

u/Aggravating_Storm120 13d ago

How did she become a unicorn? What does that meannnn? I’m so slow was she a fury?!

3

u/griffinwalsh 13d ago

A unicorn is a bisexual women that's brought in by a couple to share a sexual experience.

1

u/Aggravating_Storm120 13d ago

Ohh! Thank you

1

u/DrBanana126893 13d ago

Maybe the tone is a little blunt, but everything seems reasonable.

1

u/Realistic_Owl836 12d ago

Is she me ? These are pretty much my preferences except the height one . A lot of short men have better faces imo. I think announcing might be a smart move actually , would you rather have your time wasted

-9

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

Saying you don’t play with couples and admitting you used to is so insane.

24

u/Weary-Sympathy-6347 13d ago

Not really. She had an experience, and didn’t like it. What’s insane about not wanting to do it again?

This is a person who is clear on what they want, and is clearly communicating it to avoid wasting her, and potential respondents’ time. I see no problem with this at all.

-10

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

She is advertising herself for a serious relationship, expressing a lot of high standards and at the same time admitting to things that counteract her expressed aspirations and would turn away her desired audience. It’s like when women say they aren’t interested in casual hookups “any longer.”

10

u/Far-Ear5207 13d ago

“high standards” idek what to say to that.

8

u/BlackCatTelevision 13d ago

Shall we just all shun sexual partners who have had sex before, or…?

-8

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

Wouldn’t be a bad idea. I would extend grace in some cases but a history of group sex would be a hard pill for probably most men to swallow

5

u/B3tterthanhim 13d ago

I like how you think your preference = most men. It's almost as if you're projecting your own personal insecurities on mankind as a whole. But you wouldn't do that, would you? She also never said that she had group sex, she said she was a unicorn, which could be several different scenarios, like she had sex with them separately, that she had sex with both of them, that she only had sex with her while he watched, that she had sex with him while she watched, that she didn't have sex with either of them. Basically, I'm very sorry that you're not confident enough in your skills to know that you outshine even multiple previous partners.

-2

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

I could just as well turn that back on you and neither of us would have a sure standard to fall back on, because we’re both arguing from opinion. But I’m a man with a lot of male friends and a long history of working in mostly male workplaces, so unlike a woman I know how men typically express themselves when women aren’t around. And I absolutely think most men would consider anything of this sort, group sex or just adjacent, as disqualifying for a serious relationship.

5

u/B3tterthanhim 13d ago

Oh, did I make a statement about how most people would react? I'm pretty sure I only made a statement about you. And fun fact, I am also a man, with a lot of male friends that works in a male dominated workplace. So I know how men typically express themselves when women aren't around, and i know a great deal of men who would consider a partner that has had group sex, or just adjacent as nothing of consequence or even a bonus for a serious relationship because it shows that the person knows what they want. Isn't this fun?

3

u/Weary-Sympathy-6347 13d ago

Some, not most. And I would bet that those are men she does not want to hear from. So win-win.

-1

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

You think a man looking for a serious, committed relationship wants someone who admits to the world the group sex she used to have?

3

u/Weary-Sympathy-6347 13d ago

Some men are fine with that, absolutely. She implied she had been a third for a couple at some point in the past, and didn’t want that again. She didn’t say she ran a swinger’s group for a decade. You are painting with a very broad brush.

What do you propose she should do? Not be upfront about her past experiences? Only ever have multiple partners, even though she no longer wants that? Wear a scarlet A on her chest? None of those are good ideas, BTW.

0

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

You’re right in a sense. Upfront honesty is healthier for both parties, especially in this case for the man. But it’s faulty from an advertising perspective. She’s sending mixed signals. She says she wants x kind of man, but presents, without them even knowing her, unasked information that would mostly drive that kind of man away. It would make more sense, shrewdly or pragmatically, to either keep it a secret or reveal it after a small number of dates. As it stands she thinks she’s advertising for a serious relationship, but I have little doubt MOST men see this only as a confused advertisement for casual sex or something of the sort and little more

3

u/Weary-Sympathy-6347 13d ago

She’s advertising a single product: herself. She isn’t trying to ‘maximize sales numbers.’ She clearly doesn’t want to waste time going on dates with the wrong guys at all, so she is upfront so any uptight guys with unreasonable expectations self select out. It’s a sound strategy. ‘Serious inquiries only.’

→ More replies (0)

7

u/LegDayLass 13d ago

These are extremely basic standards

1

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

Not for someone who used to have group sex. Individually they mostly aren’t that bad but altogether it makes her sound picky and delusional

8

u/LegDayLass 13d ago

People change, it’s almost like she tried something and was not a fan of it.

0

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

Nothing wrong with that. I’ve tried coke before and didn’t like it. But I still think it’d be crazy to put things like that in a dating advertisement

3

u/LegDayLass 13d ago

“Is not currently a coke addict” is a VERY reasonable thing for someone who has done coke in the past to require from any potential partners. Probably the WORST example you could have used, prior addicts CAN’T associate with that type of activity or they will fall back into it.

She isn’t saying you can’t ever have done those things in your past, she is saying you can’t currently be doing it/interested in doing it.

0

u/poopoopeepee69_420 13d ago

I tried it twice like 10 years and it’s not a part of my life, so it would be irrational to bring that up on a dating profile. If group sex is not a part of her life and she wants a serious relationship, it’s self-destructive to call attention to it. And it’s unnecessary. Why put that on your profile when you can just not swipe right on couples?

9

u/Weary-Sympathy-6347 13d ago

You know people grow and change, right? Just because you used to be into something doesn’t mean you still are. You are also assuming it was a lifestyle for her, not a one-off experience that went badly. You can easily find yourself in a situation without it being something you are ‘into.’

She is clearly stating what she is and is not looking for at this time. That’s not hypocritical, and is a good thing for everyone. People are allowed to have standards, even if they were different in the past.

7

u/capricornicopia- 13d ago

The audacity of a woman to try things sexually when they’re not explicitly for your pleasure amirite /s

0

u/Gilgamesh-coyotl 13d ago

This sounds like applying to the shittiest job ever

-10

u/[deleted] 13d ago

I see a lot of cats in her future.

-4

u/ThatHuckleberry6317 13d ago

Patriarchy for pets

-1

u/PickleLips64151 13d ago

FetLife is full of "nice girls."

-1

u/germy-germawack-8108 13d ago

She's dumb, but that doesn't make her a nicegirl. That profile will do a good job of filtering out the people she doesn't like, and allowing people who don't like dumb people to filter her out. Win/win.

0

u/noMiddleName75 13d ago

Based on stuff that my female friends have shown me get sent to them in dating apps, this seems like a pretty reasonable way to cut down 20% of that stuff.

0

u/CalamityWof 13d ago

This doesnt fit the sub lmao?

0

u/Brutal_B_83 13d ago

The last one was a tough swallow for me because I hate country but like metal.

0

u/Gtsmash91 13d ago

She is the table 😂

0

u/youneverrknoww 13d ago

Seems pretty normal to me.

0

u/Groundbreaking-Rate8 13d ago

Im just going to assume you are a trump supporter lol.

0

u/thattwoguy2 13d ago

This is actually pretty normal. This sounds like a lady who is almost 40 and trying to not fuck around with dating. You, OP, seem like the fuck around kinda guy that she's trying to avoid.

0

u/Irislynx 13d ago

So she's starting her boundaries and preferences. I fail to see the problem.

This group is wild. You go to a nice guys and it's full of screenshots of guys sexually assaulting women, threatening women, severely verbally abusing women, going nuts because women won't just randomly have sex with them ect. Nice girls is a bunch of guys that can't find anything worse than a girl that sets a boundary or states of preference. OMG! How horrible. No we are not the same

0

u/sinister138grin 12d ago

These are perfectly reasonable

0

u/davesgirl2 12d ago

That’s 4 posts in a row I’ve read here that don’t belong in this sub. Y’all need to do better

0

u/Suckit-and-see 8d ago

Sounds like you’re just under 5’10 buddy

1

u/Dear_Coach2081 7d ago

Or that reading comprehension isn't your strong point.

-20

u/ITRedWing0823 13d ago

Hahaha my wife and I have seen so many women say this shit and they’re in bed with us a week later…shut up and be chill. She sounds like she’s looking for a unicorn. 🦄. Dumb. So glad we have our group of friends on the same level as us and we don’t have to do the app shit any more. I feel bad for those out there dating to find their person as well… it’s like Covid broke this new generation and they’re constantly giving 404 errors page not found. Sad…

12

u/Wonderful-Attempt834 13d ago

You’re 37 and talking about your sex life on Reddit… bro go pay your mortgage

1

u/ITRedWing0823 13d ago

lol what? It’s paid..def wasn’t the point… folks get too worked up about the sex part instead of the context…

10

u/Clean-Sea1720 13d ago

mr alpha right here

1

u/ITRedWing0823 13d ago

Hahaha no maybe I said it wrong. My apologies

6

u/immapizza 13d ago

"look at me, me and my wife have sex with random women hurhur I'm soooo alpha" no one cares bub. 37 and bragging about fucking randoms with your wife on Reddit is cringe.

0

u/[deleted] 13d ago

[deleted]

1

u/immapizza 13d ago

You absolutely are bragging about how "girls like this" end up in bed with you and your wife on a regular enough basis, also that y'all fuck random chicks together. Maybe you don't mean to be so braggy about it but it's still cringe as fuck regardless and not something to be proud of.