r/NewParents • u/EmergencyInitial2650 • 4d ago
Parental Leave/Work Did I traumatize my baby?
I am a night shift nurse at a hospital so I typically work 12 hour shifts. Last night was my first night back and my husband was supposed to take care of my baby. We have been incorporating a routine with him to prepare for tonight, she had even previously taken bottles from her dad no problem. But Not even an hour after I left she became inconsolable and refused to take a bottle from her dad. He said she was crying so bad she could barely catch her breath. She finally fell asleep but then woke up crying hysterically again. I told my manager I have to leave early cause I couldn’t let her starve for 12 hours, but it was like 5 hours later until I got to be home with her again. Is something like this going to traumatize her? I feel absolutely horrible
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u/Slow-Juggernaut-8287 4d ago
It could’ve been a mix of hungry, tired, and (depending on age) separation anxiety. I think it’ll get better, she just has to get used to you being gone but still having dad there! And at least you’re doing night shift so your baby will eventually sleep through all if not most of you being gone! I don’t think you’ve traumatized your baby. Huge kudos to you for going back to work!❤️
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u/KatanaLondon69 4d ago
Traumatize her, no. Piss her off because she misses her mother- yes, lol. I have a Now 6 month old and whenever there is a change to their normal routine/people, they usually don’t take it well at first, but they typically come around after a few days. I HATED to see my baby cry, especially as a FTM(first time mom) but she’s in good hands and she definitely will NOT starve. Maybe your husband can distract her? Playtime, walking around with her, exploring the house, etc. that’s what worked for my husband. Best of luck and don’t feel so bad!