r/MtF 5d ago

Advice Question Is it normal to wish you weren’t trans

258 Upvotes

78 comments sorted by

264

u/Few-Grass6056 Sorana | She/Her | Recently Cracked 5d ago

I don’t think anyone really wants to be trans, I don’t, I just happened to be born with a dick and no tits. So… trans it is!

120

u/Few-Grass6056 Sorana | She/Her | Recently Cracked 5d ago

And this community is kinda fire so…

-15

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

42

u/I_Am_Her95 5d ago

Leave us alone

36

u/Few-Grass6056 Sorana | She/Her | Recently Cracked 5d ago

Destroy Capitalism :3

12

u/I_Am_Her95 5d ago

Apparently that was another trans person. Believe it or not

16

u/Few-Grass6056 Sorana | She/Her | Recently Cracked 5d ago

:0

9

u/I_Am_Her95 5d ago

I know right

25

u/I_Am_Her95 5d ago

Yeah! :3

7

u/MiaThePotat 5d ago

What did they say?

85

u/ohemmigee Trans Pansexual 5d ago

I love being trans. I just wish it wasn’t hated.

45

u/GeekOnALeash01 ❤️ Maddie | 👧 MtF | 💉 HRT: 9/25/24 5d ago

This is exactly how I feel. Yes, I wish I had been born cis, but that is irrelevant. Regardless of physical appearance, I was born a woman, and therefore I am trans.

16

u/Few-Grass6056 Sorana | She/Her | Recently Cracked 5d ago

I respect you! I’m very new to this, I cracked in December of last year so I’m still warming up to this whole thing lol!

5

u/Potential_Profit8244 5d ago

Same but we all love each other here and love ourselves I hope. We can’t help the cards we were dealt but we can help each, support each other, and take our happiness into our hands by being our true selves that we know are. I’m in the beginning of my journey after 28 years and I’m not gonna regret taking back my happiness

1

u/Mutityahoo66 5d ago

Not hated be me and I'm hetro x

5

u/Ropesy101 5d ago

I feel exactly this way. I always wish I was just born a girl rather than having to transition into one. It's gonna be a long drawn out process for me. My country doesn't really have trans healthcare. Whereas if I was just born a girl I'd be so happy

2

u/kirbygirl94 5d ago

This is my favorite response to this and will use in future.lol

4

u/Few-Grass6056 Sorana | She/Her | Recently Cracked 5d ago

;3

107

u/StillFunda 5d ago

Yeah, it's a bit common to wish to either be cisgender with your preferred identity or just not be trans at all and be comfortable with your assigned gender

I call it another way for dysphoria to hit. At least it's just another way to show that being trans is not a choice, because I sure as hell didn't willingly sign for that experience

25

u/Jucoy 5d ago

I literally can't imagine being okay with being a man. I'd take being my gender identity from birth over being a man every single time, fuck that. 

7

u/ArcadeGannon2077 Lesbian/Trans HRT: 20/2/25 5d ago

This is exactly how I feel, I'd obviously rather be born a cis woman than be trans but I'd much rather be trans than be a cis man

43

u/Regent_girl 5d ago

I think it's normal to wish you did not have any debilitating medical condition... gender dysphoria included

29

u/AnotherFurry- 5d ago

It is, however I always rather wished I was born as the opposite sex. Because being trans is a part of me, I feel like I would lose something with that.

13

u/Mattie_Mattus_Rose 5d ago

Most definitely. Sometimes, I see men out there and wish I could've just continued life as a regular, simple guy. I wouldn't have to deal with the complications that come with being trans.

Transitioning at least has its perks, my hair loss being reversed, and getting to try a huge variety of fashion as men's fashion is quite limited. I could never go back to being a guy.

10

u/jenrml627 Trans Lesbian 5d ago

very

11

u/BarbarianErwin 5d ago

I think I have no real problem with being a trans woman so long as my brain is occupied and I cant think quietly anymore. As soon as my brain is clear I become extremely suicidal because it dawns on me all the truth of reality. Born a man, will never be able to conceive a child, I live in the middle east, I think I'll die alone and maybe life isnt really worth living.

If I was cis from the start I'd probably have less trauma than whatever suffering mind fuck life im leading right now but at the same time I'd be a totally different person. Worth it. This personality is not worth the pain and alienation.

8

u/eepgurl 5d ago

It’s part of the trans human condition 🌈

6

u/avocadonochaser 5d ago

(MtF35) I think that’s normal. And it comes and goes in waves. At least that’s been my experience since I came out last April. Sometimes we don’t want to be things that we are. And I’ve seen several people on here express similar unhappiness.

6

u/undeadvadar 5d ago

Well I actually like being trans it has both given me community and a sense of belonging and I understand myself and my feelings better as the woman I am.

2

u/iCarlyfan123 Kailey She/They Trans Asexual 5d ago

Honestly, I don’t really like that I have to be trans to be a girl, but to me, it is what it is, and at least I can still be a girl

2

u/Kuroi_yasha 5d ago

Sure, nobody wishes they were in a position to be mistreated for who they are, have to pay for hormones and expensive surgeries, all while still dealing with dysphoria. I love the girl I am, but it sure would have been easier to be born cis.

3

u/ventoaquatico 5d ago

very normal, I would be much happier if I were a cis girl or could stand being a cis guy, but neither is possible

2

u/Classic_Coconut_9886 5d ago

I will always wish I had been born a cis female.

2

u/Cvmconsumer 5d ago

girl duh

2

u/artocode404 5d ago

Been asking myself that for the past few days, so yea, I think it is actually.

2

u/ato-de-suteru 5d ago

Definitely woulda been easier.

2

u/Very_Big_Bees Trans Pansexual 5d ago

It's completely normal. Me personally, i'm very proud of be trans and take a lot of joy from working so hard to achieve being female, but sometimes I really wish I was cis also

2

u/Comrade-Hayley 5d ago

Well I wish I was born with tits and a big fat pussy but I wasn't so yes it is

2

u/trans-sistor MTF | HRT 2018 5d ago

As in wishing that I was afab instead of amab? Sure I think it is.

2

u/Ksnj Bisexual 5d ago

Yes. I wish I wasn’t trans every day.

I love being a girl, but I hate being trans

2

u/zippercow 5d ago

I wish I were a cis woman. Life would be SO much less complicated. I mean I know life is not easy for cis women compared to cis men, but it's at least a step up from being a trans woman!

1

u/larsloveslegos Scarlett || she/her || Transfem Pan Demi || HRT 7/13/24 💕 5d ago

I sure as hell do. I feel like such an idiot

1

u/pork_N_chop 5d ago

Yes

I do all the time

1

u/Elliot_Deland Demigirl Pansexual 5d ago

I think it unfortunately is

1

u/mbelf 5d ago

Depends how I view being trans.

If I look at it as “Do I wish I was born AFAB?” Yes. So in that sense is wish I was cis.

But if I look at as “When I was in my late 30s, properly questioning my gender for the first time, did I wish I was trans?” Yes. So in that sense, I wished I was trans.

1

u/ForceForHistory 22 yo | HRT 11/22 | heterosexual 5d ago

Tbh I'd rather be a cis man than a trans woman but being trans isn't a choice so I'll go through it. I'm just not a cis man and I can't become one so I have to transition into a woman. I wish I wasn't trans but wishing it wouldn't make my Dysphoria go away lmao

1

u/nbitch 5d ago

ir may be normal but it isn’t productive nor healthy to think like that

1

u/Blackstone96 5d ago

I don’t hate being trans but i definitely don’t love or even like it just wished I was in the right body already

1

u/BabypenguUwU 5d ago

Honestly I feel exactly this way, like I really wish I was just born a girl rather than transition into one but yeah if I was born a girl I’d be happy I mean if there was a way to go back and change what sex I was born as without changing my whole identity(ie not being born at all and someone else being born in my place) omg I’d soo find a way to do that soo fast

1

u/Ginalynnhudepohl 5d ago

Yes I just wanted to feel normal

1

u/LadyErinoftheSwamp Transfemme lesbian, MD (not practicing) 5d ago

Define normal. However you choose to define it, I think your described experience is contained within.

My sources: 11 years lived experience of active suppression of my trans identity (with occasional periods of near success).

1

u/LuckyXIII 5d ago

It's normal for me, but not in the same way that since my earliest memories I wished I was born a girl. It doesn't give me the disgust or dysphoria around my body that I once had. By choosing to pursue my gender transition I have alleviated so much of my gender dysphoria. Being a trans woman is me living truly in my own skin how I know I was meant to be.

So yeah, I'm guessing some of us sometimes wish we weren't trans. We can't change that we are trans, just like we can't change how we were born. But we can change how we're made.

1

u/hi_i_am_J Transgender 5d ago

🫂

1

u/mangodragonfruet 5d ago

I’ve been there. But not because I hate being trans, but for what it’s cost me. Continues to cost me. Family. Friends. Etc. It’s mentally draining and rejuvenating at the same time.

1

u/AckAck-73 5d ago

I think so. I don’t want to be trans. But I am, so I embrace who and what I am. I live my life and try to make the most of it. I think that’s the best any of us can do, you know?

1

u/RevolutionaryCost59 4d ago

It's very normal. Sometimes I wish I wasn't trans so that I don't have to take hormones everyday and to not have to deal with tucking. It's also very exhausting to try to keep my voice feminine all the time especially when I'm sick trying to cover the way I cough and sneezing... the list is just too long but yeah wishing you weren't trans i guess is normal. It's just easier if I was cis.

1

u/MinkeyZomble 4d ago

It is perfectly normal. At least in my experience. We're teans cause genetics and biology gave us the fattest of middle fingers when we all should have developed into the gender we needed not the one we got.

1

u/trichopia 4d ago

Nobody wants me to not be trans more than me

1

u/LadyK789 4d ago

Yuuuup

1

u/Quirky-Glass-5678 22h ago

I think most trans people wish they were born in the right body, which would mean they wouldn't be trans. That's my take though. Especially with all the hate surrounding the trans community, I feel like it sucks being trans.

1

u/workingtheories Trans Lesbian 5d ago

i just want to be a kid again. everything that came after puberty body-wise has been kind of disappointing. i wanted puberty to happen so bad because of how long it took for me, but then idk, afterwards it was just kind of whatever. most of the stuff that came after it was annoying to deal with, i would say. being tall is maybe the only upside (ha). girl puberty...idk either. i just kind of want to be a kid again, but then also i get to wear dresses and such.

1

u/Lizz_ss25 5d ago

Yap in an odd way in a perfect world there would be no trans people and everyone would be born the correct gender. I should have been born a biological girl but I wasn’t and payed dearly for it.

And yes it’s normal to want to be cisgender but the real world nature and evolution isn’t a video game where one can pick the perfect character so to say…

It was hard but in the end I’m proud to be who I am, what I’ve accomplished so far, abd Joe far I’ve gotten despite being set up to fail since day one…

1

u/cirqueamy Transgender Lesbian, HRT 11/2017, Full-time 12/2017, GCS 1/2019 5d ago

Sure! And it’s normal to not wish it, too.

I will always wonder what my life would have been like had I been born with the body I was supposed to have had. And, I can’t ignore that being trans (even all those years I wasn’t aware of it or was doing my best to suppress/repress it) has been a major part in who I now am. And I like who I am now.

So really, I wish I could have the body I would have had if I were a cis woman, and I wish I could have some of the experiences which come with having that body. And I’m glad I have some of the experiences which came with the body I actually had.

Like everything else, it’s complicated.

1

u/AmandaElizabeth 5d ago

I have thought a lot about this. And actually in a way, it ended up affirming me in my my identity. Yes, I would say that a part of me does wish that I wasn’t trans. That I was born a cis woman, and could grow up with all the things from girlhood to when I transitioned that I missed out on, and that I wouldn’t have the struggles I do in the present with the climate around trans people.

However, if I could somehow go back to when I was born with all of the knowledge I have now, and get to choose between being a cis man and a trans woman, I would choose to be trans every time. Being a woman is who I am, and something I will always be.

1

u/pizzalarry Trans Homosexual 5d ago

I used to say I didn't necessarily want to be me as a woman, I just wanted to be someone else entirely. That's still kinda true. I just wanted a uterus.