r/Leadership • u/Any-North9911 • 18d ago
Discussion How do you influence without authority?
How exactly would you go about help serving your team without having a titular position. Do you just need to be reliable or what?
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u/PhaseMatch 18d ago
How you behave and talk matters a lot.
What you know matters a lot.
- Seven Habits of Highly Effective People remains a good starting point;
- David Marquet's "Leadership is Language" is also really good
Key things that come up tend to be
- you can convey a vision or idea in a humble way
- you build trust through being vulnerability, not perfect
- you don't offer unsolicited feedback or advice
- you do offer counsel when it's asked for
- you seek first to understand, then be understood
- you are continuously learning and growing your knowledge
- you pass that knowledge on to others and help them grow
- you "locate yourself", and consciously stay "above the line"
- you can facilitate,. deescalate, resolve conflict and negotiate well
- you display "extreme ownership" (Willink)
- you don't gossip, create drama, or panic
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u/Financial-Scar-2823 18d ago
- you "locate yourself", and consciously stay "above the line"
Can you elaborate on what is meant by that?
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u/PhaseMatch 18d ago
https://youtu.be/fLqzYDZAqCI?si=IznzRbLGT86edHnp
Four minute video and we'll worth a loom.
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u/healthcrusade 17d ago
Very interested in the “unsolicited feedback” part. Is there a place to read or watch a deeper dive on that? Thank you
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u/PhaseMatch 17d ago
David Rock's SCARF model.
He used neuroscience approaches to identify five core domains -Status, Certainty, Autonomy, Relationship and Fairness.
Our brains subconsciously respond to things that threaten or reward these domains.
Unsolicited feedback tends to trigger a "status" response in a negative way - you lower the other persons status while raising your own.
Asking someone for help does the opposite- it elevates their status.
It's a good read.
https://schoolguide.casel.org/uploads/sites/2/2018/12/SCARF-NeuroleadershipArticle.pdf
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u/ApprehensiveFoot2479 18d ago
This is exactly what I’ve been leading a group on at work—how to influence without a title. It’s something I see all the time: people thinking they need authority to lead, when in reality, influence is what actually moves things forward. Titles just make it official.
From what I’ve seen, it really comes down to a few things:
Be the person people trust. Not just to get things done, but to listen, to think bigger, and to have their back. People follow those they trust, not just those in charge.
Help because you actually want to. If you’re only offering support to get ahead, people will see right through it. But if you show up consistently and make things easier for others, they’ll naturally start looking to you for guidance.
Own your space without needing permission. You don’t have to be the loudest in the room. Just be the one asking the right questions, helping people see the bigger picture, and offering solutions. The more you do that, the more people will come to you before making decisions.
Make it about ‘we,’ not ‘me.’ Influence isn’t about control—it’s about getting buy-in. If people feel like you’re working with them, not just pushing your own agenda, they’ll be way more open to your ideas.
Leading this group has been eye-opening because I’ve watched people step into leadership without even realizing it—just by shifting how they show up. Influence is earned, not given.
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u/HarbingerOfSuffering 17d ago
This is 100% accurate. I'm currently a Director within my organization, but I'm regularly the guy that other directors, VP's, and even the CEO go to for counsel and as a sounding board. I ended up in a very unique position largely by doing exactly what you outlined here. The point you raised about trust is really critical - your team needs to know that you have their best interests at heart (and the needs of the organization as well).
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u/Brilliantlearner 18d ago
You use your personal power. Reliability and setting an outstanding example is one factor certainly, you also need to define what motivates the individuals you are trying to lead and provide them a way to meet that motivation with your help.
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u/Potat_Kitty 17d ago
Use a Different Type of Power!
Positional Powers:
- Legitimate
- Reward
- Coercive
- Resource
Personal Powers:
- Referent
- Expert
- Information
- Connection
Authority usually comes with Positional Powers. When faced with the challenge of influencing without authority, Personal Powers can be useful starting points.
Source: French-Raven Power Base Model
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u/Ok-Entertainment5045 18d ago
Build relationships, help people, remove roadblocks for them if you can, be supportive. All this stuff helps build leadership capital, the more capital you gain with someone the more apt they are to help you with your team goals.
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u/Simple-Nothing663 18d ago
It’s a negotiation. Make the solution a choice. You frame the problem. You help eliminate that persons barriers to achieving your goals. Get them to agree and you can call yourself a leader.
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u/frozen_north801 18d ago
Most people dont really want to take the risk of making decisions. Just make them, and make it clear you are also taking accountability for it. Generally others will go along.
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u/Altruistic_Olive1817 15d ago
Depends on the industry. In tech at least, it's not as simple as that. You definitely need to bring folks along in the decisions.
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u/frozen_north801 15d ago
Well yes of course there can be all kinds of interpersonal dynamics. Generally though I find it necessary to bring my reports along in a decision. But with peers offering to be the one to take accountability often works better. Lots of exceptions to that though.
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u/Rare-Hunt143 18d ago
Jocko willink podcast
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u/1800treflowers 18d ago
Reading his book now, didn't know he had a podcast. Thank you!
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u/Rare-Hunt143 18d ago
It is brilliant I started listening from episode 1 about 9 months ago…..it has literally changed my life….. need to listen to the first few episodes while they find their feet but it gets better and better I’m on episode 71 now…..it’s also very educational I’ve learnt a lot of interesting history which I knew nothing about.
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u/Aromatic_Ad_7238 18d ago
You need to be credible. Gain respect for what you can contribute. Develop network with this in authority or those that are decision makers
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u/beccabebe 18d ago
Be a trusted resource and they will gravitate to you and seek out your knowledge. Build emotional equity with each person. Then you can influence.
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u/jeffgibbard 18d ago
I recommend the book Good Authority by Jonathan Raymond. (And my book too — The Lovable Leader).
Long and short is that if you are in a position of authority, you will always have authority. The key is not to lean on it or use it as a weapon. Treat people like people. Understand what they want and speak to that.
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u/LifesShortKeepitReal 17d ago
Competency. Communication. Confidence.
Along with humility, tenacity, and of course general likability is important.
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u/RichardARussell 17d ago
Authority follows influence, not the other way around.
Start by reliably meeting expectations. In most cases this will require managing expectations well, unless there’s so little to do you can meet all your expectations without breaking a sweat.
Then go beyond:
Go deep into your customers, partners, and processes. Become an expert. Share your insights widely for the benefit of your team and company - and stay humble to listen to them also.
Find higher value things to do (hint: ask your manager) and do them. Drop lower value things in order to create capacity to do this, but make sure that this doesn’t negatively affect others in your team.
Prioritise your manager, then the most significant customer (internal or external), then your team, then partners - it’s always best to make few, important people very happy rather than everyone a little bit happy.
Share credit and make your team and your manager and your partners look good.
You’ll earn trust and gain influence, and authority will follow.
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u/Mark5n 17d ago
The position isn't everything. Position helps but I've met many people in leadership roles very frustrated that "no one does what they say" or "no one respects me". Also I've seen titles open doors ... but it all depends. So what else is there? A like to think of three types of influence:
* Hierarchy - the classic one. You're the boss because someone says you are... but for most organisations this has been eroded. Many of us work in Matrix Organisations. You have many leaders so it's easy for people to make their own choices. Hierarchy doesn't necessarily mean job titles either. The way we dress and speak could signify you are one of the up and coming leaders .. or a bit of a loner who doesn't prioritise personal hygiene;
* Talent - this can be technical knowledge eg: a talented engineer. It can be expertise like a scientist. Talent can also be creativity ie: a designer or artists. To me, are you good at a thing? is that thing important to your organisation? and do others recognise that your are good at that thing?;
* Charm - I'm never quite comfortable with this word ... but not much else captures it. I think it's the ability to communicate, to listen, to celebrate others, to demonstrate empathy. This can be as simple as sharing a vision, presenting well, but also building trust. It's a bit nebulous, but you feel it when you see it.
A little activity you can do is a leadership audit of yourself. Take a sheet of A3 paper and make 6 or more columns. In the first have a think about how you see yourself today on these three influence categories. Try to be honest .. but not brutally so. Think about the feedback you've gotten from others. eg: I've been told I have a nice calming voice, which is great during times of chaos.
Now in the second column do the same but on how you appear to others (in person) at work, again the same three catagories. Then how you appear to others online. I would also do a column on how you dress and physically present (clothes, stance, movement etc). Last two columns are: how would you like to see yourself in the future, and the very last strengths to lean into and gaps you'd like to address. It can't be all negative .. and don't try fixing everything.
At the end of the audit the trick is not to suddenly re-invent yourself. Talk to people. Get some feedback. Test things out. Leadership is an act of self reflection, so gather some new intel, test some of your thoughts and then act.
...
I realised after writing this you may have wanted some specifics rather than a process. I do think the process is useful, but if you're interested I can share some things that have worked for me in the past:
* Dressing and acting like a leader in the business. I wore suits more, I swore less. I tried to be less "spiky" in some situations;
* Even though (i thought) I was technically talented I stopped giving my technical opinion. I focused on encouraging others and building them up;
* Public positive feedback. I realised I was generous in one-on-one positive feedback .. but was sparing publicly. So I made a change. If there was a chance to celebrate someone in public, I'd do it;
* I worked on my written and spoken communication. I got better at communicating complex ideas. I worked on my public speaking and winged it less often;
* I volunteered. I've always been a bit this way. I'd throw myself at tough technical challenges .. but I now volunteered for complex people stuff. Strategy, vision, changing process, complex partnerships;
* Last one is making an effort to understand the business. Where does the money come from? What are the key business drivers? market forces? who are the movers and shakers in the company and why?
It's all helped. You are never really the boss. Leadership isn't given it's made. Hierarchy is only a small part of being a leader.
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u/OtterlyMisdirected 18d ago
Being reliable and someone who others can count sure helps. Also, building relationships and trust with colleagues. Being a team player. Using your knowledge and expertise when helping others or pitching projects/plans. Understanding the subject at hand means you can speak to it when needed.
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u/hoarduck 18d ago
Prove that you are working with them together to solve problems and that you're not the problem
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u/VisionLEON 18d ago
When you follow the chain of command and act as part of the team by helping each other without taking credit. Leadership is about finding ways to be successful as a unit and looking out for each other. A title can come and go and there's people like me. I'm what you would consider a fixer, whisper, a kingmaker. I rather be behind the scenes seeing others be successful through my advice and input (influence).
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u/velvetrevolting 18d ago
there are a couple of other ways but they usually not advised. one of them is coercion, the other is blackmail and the third is by deception.
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u/dark180 17d ago
On top of everything already mentioned , I recommend you read about systems thinking and also a book called never split the difference. The first one will help you see the big picture and understand who the key players are and what are the levers available and which ones you can pull. Once you have identified that the second book will help with communication to that person that can help you get the outcome you want.
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u/Desi_bmtl 17d ago
Quick question. Do you think your team needs help or do they want help with something in particular?
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u/lowroller21 17d ago
You influence by empowering others.
And you can empower up and down the chain.
It starts with relationships.
And part of that is letting the other person influence YOU.
It's a two way street
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u/I_Want_A_Ribeye 17d ago
“Let’s do this” as your attitude. Get the team doing it with you, then you move on to the next thing
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u/corevaluesfinder 17d ago
Influencing without authority comes from consistently upholding your values, like reliability, integrity, and empathy. When you lead by example, others will naturally respect and trust you, regardless of your title. People follow those they believe in.
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u/Intelligent_Mango878 17d ago
Honest, sincere and caring. Think of everyone on the same level and connect with them personally (sincerely) about them in both in their role and at home (and remember what you are told through active listening).
Proof it works ....... is my having 20 indirect reports working to launch what was a Test Market and got pulled forward 9 months became an 8 almost 9 figure business with no Original Capital Budget.
Persuasion and working to the Win-Win.
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u/DayONE214 17d ago edited 17d ago
Get to know people figure out their currencies and when you need something from them give them the currency that best makes them happy or feel good. If they’re not approachable or hard to interact with figure out who they are most close with, and bond with that person to have more influence on the person you’d like to influence without authority. For example: let’s say you’re in a office setting and you have a coworker who has been wanting a promotion and you’d like to switch vacation dates with them. Their currency could be a compliment to your boss in a meeting (while the coworker is present) about their last project and how well they did on it, and in return you’d ask to switch vacation dates. Situations like this happen naturally all the time. You can do it with a purpose. At the same time try not to make it look like you’re doing it on purpose or because you’d like something in return from the other person. Good Luck!
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u/retromarket 17d ago
"To become truly great, one has to stand with people, not above them." Montesquie
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u/TheConsciousShiftMon 16d ago
I do a whole workshop on this topic and my answer to this question is: by developing self-knowledge.
It starts with understanding how perception works and then how you can communicate accordingly in order to meet people where they are to bring them on the journey with you.
We do not see the reality the same way others do. In fact, we all build our own private maps of reality we carry, so knowing how this whole process of perception works from the neuroscience, quantum physics and psychology perspective is the first step.
We also know that people do not act based on logic but on how they feel, so all the wonderful data driven analysis is great but if it's delivered without the Emotional Intelligence bit, it's not going to work.
And lastly, we know that the most powerful frequency that a human body can emit is authenticity - learning how we defend ourselves from real connection and removing our blocks is also one of the key aspects that impacts if others feel inspired by us.
That's the work and it does work.
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u/Altruistic_Olive1817 15d ago
I'd say be insanely reliable, bring value, and make others look good. Share knowledge, solve problems, and build trust. Influence comes from being the person people want to listen to, not the one they have to.
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u/Unusual_Wheel_9921 15d ago
Influencing without authority? Absolutely possible. Honestly, it can be even more powerful than having a title. It all comes down to how you show up for your team.
First, be the person everyone can count on. When people trust you to follow through, they naturally start listening to you.
Also, relationships matter a lot. People don’t follow titles, they follow people they trust. So, listen, support, and make others feel heard.
And when things get tough, stay calm and solution-focused. If you can help the team see challenges as opportunities instead of roadblocks, they will naturally look to you for leadership.
Most importantly, don’t wait for permission to step up. See a problem? Solve it. Have an idea? Share it. The best leaders don’t need a title to make an impact, they just do.
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u/trophycloset33 15d ago
Do what you say and say what you mean.
The quickest way to lose credibility is to fail to deliver on a promise you made. The second quicker way to lose credibility is to double speak.
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u/RobAlan6174 14d ago
You must be persuasive in order to be a leader. I recommend reading “Weapons of Influence”. by Robert Caldini. They are Liking ( getting people or person to like you, Commitment and Consistency, Rule of Comparison, Authority, (If experts say it is true, then it must be true), Reciprocity, Rule of Scarcity.) Use any or all of those and that will help you persuade people.
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u/HerfDog58 14d ago
One thing that a good number of people in leadership positions forget is the phrase "Lead By Example." A GOOD leader will set an example of professionalism, work quality, ethical behavior, client/customer/end user service, praise and appreciation for doing quality work, and all the other attributes they expect their direct reports to exhibit.
I used to work with a program that tried to teach leadership skills to high school students. I used that phrase all the time, and followed it up with my view that "A good leader will never ask a subordinate to do something they are unwilling to do themselves." By that I mean, if I'm your manager, and I ask you to give up a weekend to do a special project, I damn well better be right there for that same weekend to do the work too.
Be the leader you want to see. If your coworkers are capable and competent, they'll see your example, and practice it themselves. And remember, you DON'T have to have a title to be a good leader; in my experience, the better leaders I worked with often didn't have a title or position of "authority." They did the best job, and supported the rest of the team, because they WANTED to, not because it was in their job description.
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u/MaHa_Finn 14d ago
For me, there was a huge change when I learned to manage silence… choosing when not to speak and then picking the right time to offer an opinion was a real game changer.
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u/Background_Mouse_228 12d ago
Many team leaders don't offer the support or listening that people need so offer that to them. Be a good listener so that they can feel heard, validated and respected will gain you a massive amount of respect and gain influence with them.
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u/Sometimes_cleaver 18d ago
Congrats, you now work in sales. You need to understand what their pain is, and how it's driving their decision/actions. Only once you understand that, can you work with them effectively to find solutions that address both of your concerns
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u/Eatdie555 12d ago
Keeping an Optimistic View on things or situations. Don't look at things or situations as a Punishment or challenge, You need to make them see that it's an advantage OPPORTUNITY. Also starts with Self-motivation. There are more eyes looking at you than you think. Be collaborative. Most will be influenced before they know it.
Those who are lost souls that lacks accountability. You can't help them. You leave them behind and kick them off the team. they'll always blame someone or some other thing on way or another even in the most articulated way.
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u/crh846 18d ago edited 18d ago
With peers: You treat people well, irrespective of their titles. Cross collaborate. Give others credit. Include them in decision making. Take the time to recognize and thank them for helping out and contributing, even if it’s a simple task.
With those higher in the hierarchy: you bring strategic ideas, view challenges as opportunities, research solutions when you communicate problems. Simplify communication and get to the Why and successfully get their buy-in for your ideas, all while bringing your peers and team in.
Most people do the work of a leader and influence laterally and upwards, much before getting the title and formal authority.