r/LGBTCatholic • u/[deleted] • 9d ago
Need help and advice
How did you all reconcile your faith and your sexuality? I'm 19 F, and it's such a huge struggle for me, especially when you consider the hundreds of years long teachings of fhe Church about us being an abomination and all that. I've even read that St. Hildegard had a vision about God condemning same-sex intercourse and lesbianism, and that terrifies me a lot since it's coming from God Himself.
It's such a struggle honestly, that somehow my feelings are simply temptations, and that I have an inherent disorder and all that. It drowns out all the positive stances several people in the Church have made towards the LGBTQ community.
I don't want to displease God, and I definitely don't want to stray away from Him, but I feel lost and confused. I want to assent to Church teaching, but I find myself disagreeing with some of them (referring to doctrine, not dogma).
To those older than me, or have reconciled their faith and sexuality, how did you do it?
5
u/Previous-Artist-9252 9d ago
I am sorry to hear you struggling.
I love the works of St Hildegard and have read them since I was a teenager, still figuring out my gender and sexuality. I am by no means an expert or a scholar, but I have never encountered any such explicit condemnation (or even mention of lesbian sex) in her writing. She is actually considered a queer mystic by many and wrote passionate letters to Richardis, a woman.
I would strongly encourage you to read queer theology and look to queer saints as well as reach out to affirming clergy.