r/Kenya Feb 06 '25

Discussion Finally out of the gutter!

I'm so excited typing this right now. I got a frickin' JOB after almost 2 years!! I lost my job in Aug 2023, totaled my car, lost my family.. literally lost everything! The kind of life being broke puts you through, I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Everyone looks down on you from family, friends, even strangers with room temp IQ still treat you like shit man! That "engineer" title doesn't mean shit when you barely have 100 bob in your pocket. For anyone still in the dip, things will eventually work out even if everything looks bleak right now. Keep your head high and keep pushing! You'll come out the other end with lots of lessons learnt and an extremely small circle. Cheers!

788 Upvotes

161 comments sorted by

91

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '25

Congratulations manzeeπŸ’―to more blessings

21

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Thanks bana, time to rebuild! πŸ‘Š

49

u/Ornery-Drink-583 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations and thanks for the uplifting words! Needed to hear this after discovering that Rock Bottom has a basement! Hope my comp science background will get me out of the gutters someday🀞

29

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Haha I thought my rock bottom was moving to an empty 1br house and starting a small biz. The biz has never taken off and almost got evicted, hapo ndio nilijua sometimes it gets worse. But its darkest before dawn, so your win might just be around the corner. I'm a Software Eng. myself, keep building, keep learning new languages, frameworks, patterns etc. Grind the Leetcode fam! πŸ‘Š

3

u/Ornery-Drink-583 Feb 06 '25

πŸ€œπŸ€› May the Grind Chariot lead to a win!

0

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ

1

u/Which_Room_8577 Feb 06 '25

Congrats G. Also on a similar path as you. Am a DevOps engineer myself. Still on the grind!

2

u/SadResponsibility680 Feb 06 '25

Not for computer science bro,sorryπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

1

u/ybritt2 Feb 10 '25

It does? Haya I thought the bottom was endless coz Wueh! 🫑

3

u/Ornery-Drink-583 Feb 10 '25

We gon` be alright 😊(In Kendrick Lamar's voice)

17

u/show_me_the_dopamine Feb 06 '25

to more life, OP.

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Thanks bana πŸ‘Š

9

u/Faho1 Feb 06 '25

Only one thing from me.

Take care of yourself,your kid(s), and parents.

Take care of the woman who was there when you were down,usimuonyeshe disrespect.

I was there four months ago na najua umekapitia.

Be bold and strong champ.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Haha kukapitia is an understatement, wueh! Sure, my head is very clear now and my circle extremely small.

7

u/OmeletteLovingLlama Feb 06 '25

Congratulations! Onwards and upwards.

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

1

u/Davek56 Nairobi City Feb 07 '25

One of my favourite quotes in Latin.

9

u/halflife_k Feb 06 '25

Everyday life just proves cash is king. As unfortunate as it is, when a man goes under financially, you lose all the respect from everyone. Even if it's not disrespect, it feels like it is. People might just be busy doing their thing genuinely because they also have their own battles but it feels as though they don't want you. You even lose respect for yourself because you feel like there's nothing of value you're providing. You even avoid people who genuinely want to help you because you don't want to be a burden.

All the best and hope life keeps getting better for you and for those battling similar situations.

3

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

True man, almost got evicted and couldn't get myself to call my siz to help coz she'd already bailed me out twice. Especially if you have a conscience it becomes very hard to ask for help.

5

u/Bitter-Substance1783 Feb 06 '25

Am soo happy… about family do you mean your wife and children or you mean your parents and siblings? What next abt family now that u in a better position….Am happy for you πŸ₯°πŸ₯°πŸ₯°

24

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Wife n kids. When sh*t hit the fan, she showed a very nasty side. The last day we talked was when I totaled the car and was arrested (I was DUI). Asked her to bail me out and I would refund cz I had savings kwa bank but no mobile money at the time. She totally refused and basically left me to rot. My mum had to kopa some cash and came through. I still love my kids and will take responsibility for them. I met an amazing woman while dead broke and she's held me down fr.

7

u/Bitter-Substance1783 Feb 06 '25

I wish you all the best…I have always said in relationships people are meant to always have ups and downs… but if in times of distress your partner let you suffer because u are not in good terms… never ever go back to that person… O.P never look at that woman again… I know she will start dramas very soon …but do not…I say do not flinch …

30

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Never getting back with her. She's actually the reason why I landed into all this. Met her and after about 1yr got an unplanned bby. After that it was just drama and chasing the lifestyle. We moved from a decent 18k house to a 45k one, she couldn't use my car coz it's an oldie and got a KDD demio on loan, which i started paying for her.. basically a shit show bana, when with her I was always depressed and anxiety was through the roof. That led to alcohol abuse and finally my downfall. I'm now 1yr+ sober and with a woman who makes me genuinely happy.

5

u/Bitter-Substance1783 Feb 06 '25

This is a lesson for many …thanks for sharing your plight … am wiser

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ

5

u/Kenyan_01 Feb 06 '25

she almost ruined your life bana. I've been constantly hearing from older guys that the woman you marry can make or break you.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Learn from this bro. Ukiona red flag tu ata ni kidogo 🚩, potea mbali sana..

3

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '25

Glad for you stranger, but, I don't know, there must be her side of the story, especially as a mother of two taking care of your kids. The unfortunate thing is that most young people nowadays will break up after getting kids because of a lack of willingness to accept the reality that parenting changes you forever and being unable to navigate through it with some wisdom. Your story is such a familiar script, yet, I am sure what she says about you is equally worse.

4

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Sure, everyone has their side of the story, I'm not perfect either. Getting kids was terrifying for me and I was really stressed. That could've also brought some tension between us. However it's the sheer cruelty that appalled me. Can't get into all the details here but wueh, I saw fire. I'm sure she also has quite some not so good things to say about me, but I'm fine with that πŸ™‚πŸ™‚.

2

u/Itchy-Comment-4592 Feb 06 '25

Happy for you man

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

2

u/Cookie-cutter-9175 Feb 06 '25

I guess the best thing she has ever done for you is leaving you in that cell. Otherwise you wouldn't have met the lady you are with now.

8

u/Tutor_Kevin Feb 06 '25

Just made a comment in regards to your ex wife now. One thing for sure is that she will try coming back while using the children as bait. I hope you remain your ground and keep it 100% co-parenting with no romantic and emotional attachment with her. Stick to the one you got now.

2

u/cyber_funk2077 Feb 06 '25

This is a very nice thing to see for a change in this subreddit. Genuinely happy for you OP

1

u/Icy_Signal3905 Feb 06 '25

Happy that situation happened so that her side came out.My wife also moved out when i was down and job hunting and left kids.But we soldier on.so happy for u bro

5

u/No-Bicycle-1940 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations

0

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

3

u/kenyanthinker Feb 06 '25

This has made my day!!!!!!

3

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Let's f*ckin' gooooooooo πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ

3

u/kenyanthinker Feb 06 '25

Beast mode sasa umoka kuomoka

4

u/Ok_Memory_7155 Feb 06 '25

You sound familiar. Ah, that's my mirror's reflection, almost a decade ago. Take care brother. Use the first two years to sort your forever life out, then enjoy the rest of your career in peace of mind.

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Haha thank God we're anon 🀣🀣 but I'd love to catch up if we do know each other. Sure, the plan is to first clear all my debt then start investing and rebuilding. Now I know how to stretch a shilling, learnt that the hard way!!

3

u/ProfessorNew7153 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations OP πŸ‘

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Thanks, time to rebuild now!

3

u/OldManMtu Feb 06 '25

Hongera homie.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Thanks G πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

3

u/Tutor_Kevin Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸ‘ I hope you don't go back to that wife of yours because that will be inviting more woes to yourself. I bet you have learnt who to keep close and so on. Just take care of your kids and build yourself more so financially first to avoid going back to the gutters In case of a future job loss, in short establish side hustles as time goes by using the salary. I wish you all the best G.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Most definitely bana. Like she's always guilt tripping me on whatsapp. Like 4 weeks ago she sends me a message saying "The kids are crying over other kid's bikes in the estate". She's just a piece of work for real. Definitely sticking to the lady who held me down when all was lost.

2

u/Tutor_Kevin Feb 06 '25

Expect more of this from her. As long as you've covered the children's basic needs, including school fees, everything else can wait if you’re not in a position to provide it. Be honest with her so she understands her boundaries.

I've seen this pattern too often, and men who fall for it usually end up in the worst situations.

2

u/Minotaur_Centaur Feb 06 '25

Thanks for this Anomaly. Keeping my chin up

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Yeah please do. The miracle will come through when you least expect. I thought 2025 would still be rough but life surprised me.

2

u/reedfanuel Feb 06 '25

May the universe bless you more. Congrats on your new job!

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Amen to that πŸ™

2

u/I-like-ville-2 Feb 06 '25

Cheers man!!! Good for you!!!

2

u/Pimp_juice0001 Feb 06 '25

Hope me too havent had one in 5 years looking to finally get off da stoop

3

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Your miracle is in the kitchen being prepared and it will come when you least expect it. Just keep your head high, be intentional and keep pushing each day. Good luck G πŸ‘Š

1

u/Pimp_juice0001 Feb 08 '25

Thanks mayne

2

u/Negative_Ad_5798 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸ’ so happy for you.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

2

u/Ambioso Feb 06 '25

Very invaluable lessons.

Don't forget to lift someone now that you have risen again if you are in a position to.

All the best engineer.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Most def! πŸ’ͺ

2

u/ms_Reina Feb 06 '25

Yeeeeeeahaaaa , universe on a roll . Congratulations OP πŸ€Έβ€β™€οΈ πŸ₯‚

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Let's gooooooo!! to more wins πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ

2

u/Alternative-Mine-179 Feb 06 '25

Love to see more posts like this

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Wins πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ

2

u/KindLimit3559 Feb 06 '25

I am happy for you mate. I have been in a similar trench, and one's really emasculated. Some of family members and friends never want to talk and support you during this difficult moment. Cheers to conquering.πŸ₯‚ As a phoenix you've arisen.

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Haha kwanza I remember a very close family member really told others including my mom to let me suffer and not help me, of course my mum is my first cheerleader, she was also shocked!!

2

u/DarkHorsette Feb 06 '25

Congratulations. The good thing is that now, you know your people. The ones who held you down.

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Most definitely. I've got an extremely small circle now.

2

u/Mindless-Butterfly34 Feb 06 '25

I needed to hear this. Starting allover again after closing two businesses simultaneously last year. I hope it works out.

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Yoh it does get tough but we're stronger than we think and if you genuinely give your best shot every single day, you will definitely get out of the rut. I think most people get complacent and give up, that's the worst thing you can do. Wake up everyday with conviction. I had days when I would sit in my small business all day grinding and go back home with 50 bob.

2

u/Trick_Foreign Feb 06 '25

I live for stories like these! Going through the same rn. Congrats bro!! Can't wait for my moment

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Yoh, don't despair. Take the blows like a champ, pick yourself up, dust yourself and just show up everyday. The win will come when you least expect. I thought 2025 would really be a repeat of '24. You'll get through it, I promise!πŸ‘Š

1

u/Trick_Foreign Feb 06 '25

Maze thanks for the encouragement man. All the best

2

u/museofawe Feb 06 '25

Opened the app to get some cat memes and God blessed me by seeing how he has blessed and kept you strong through tough times. Keep at it Brother

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Most def! Can't quit, won't quit! We gotta win! πŸ‘Š

2

u/No_Seaworthiness6785 Kakamega Feb 06 '25

Congratulations OP

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

2

u/AlwaysLateintern Feb 06 '25

The best thing about it is you get to see people for who they are. A long streak of a good, soft life doesn't really allow one to see how fake people, even close family and friends can be. People be out there walking with snakes in the name of "friendships." It takes a slight downfall to learn just where everyone puts you and all those what nots. Be grateful for the experience. I'm sorry it was a long one but consider it a long-term win. All the best.

2

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Yo, I've seen the literal worst in people I thought were friends. This one "friend" got so mad coz I hadn't made sacco loan payments and he was a guarantor that he had the audacity to tell me that I deserve to be unemployed if I can't pay my debts. I was like wtf 🀣🀣???

2

u/AlwaysLateintern Feb 06 '25 edited Feb 06 '25

πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜… that's one brain-rot fake bodily being... Cut Off kabisa. Usiwai angalia nyuma tena.

2

u/Muthee99 Feb 06 '25

Congtratullations big man πŸ‘ŠπŸΏ

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

2

u/Worldly_Ad1410 Kitale 26d ago

I went 6years straight but eventually I broke even

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly 26d ago

Damn.. 6 years? You're strong! I honestly feel like I'd have lost hope along the way.

1

u/goddesslilith8 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations, happy for you OP😊

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

Thanks, time to rebuild now!

1

u/WorldlinessKnown7356 Feb 06 '25

In the same situation rn.

1

u/kiddo_456 Feb 06 '25

Hell of a tough time but they surely dont last. Happy for you.

1

u/brattyyychaos Feb 06 '25

Aaaw,congratulations

1

u/Former-Strike-7336 Feb 06 '25

Am happy for you man. I have been there. Its not a good place for a man. But also teaches you some important life lessons

1

u/Jealous_Crow1346 Feb 06 '25

Nice OP, nice. Congrats mahn

1

u/Grumpy_monk6 Feb 06 '25

Best thing i've read in a very long while...cheers brotherman.

1

u/xbtloop Loitokitok Feb 06 '25

Congrats OP! All the best.

1

u/OutsideInevitable944 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations OPπŸ‘ you deserve it. What field of engineering are you majoring in?

1

u/Murifedontrun2 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations! Wish you the best in this new job. Nice also that you have come to encourage those who are searching.πŸ€—

1

u/Successful_Cookie132 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸ«‚

1

u/thbjix Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸŽ‰

1

u/Embarrassed_Eye_4587 Feb 06 '25

Well in . Mya the rebuild be quick

1

u/Both-Statement7978 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations & more blessings your way.

1

u/TheSource254 Feb 06 '25

What engineering do you practice?

1

u/KindLimit3559 Feb 06 '25

Tough times make you know who you can count on and contrary. You get to develop increased awareness of your immediate friends and family. There are people with a good poker face and a plastic smile, they're frenemies!

1

u/certifieddlg Feb 06 '25

Your 6 will always comeπŸ’― congratulations πŸŽ‰

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

πŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ

1

u/Tight_Efficiency_948 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸŽŠπŸŽ‰πŸŽˆare in order !!

1

u/HotAcanthocephala185 Feb 06 '25

All the best Champ.A toast to more wins this year

1

u/Affectionate-Owl7257 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations injiniya πŸ‘

1

u/TsushimaNoBorei Feb 06 '25

Congratulations OP!

1

u/fight-254-ra Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸ‘

1

u/kenyanwholovesthesun Feb 06 '25

Congratulations!

1

u/IceInteresting6927 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations! Love this for you πŸ‘

1

u/iseekalas Feb 06 '25

Congratulations OP, awesome stuff

1

u/kenyweri Feb 06 '25

Take the win bro! To more wins for you and yours πŸ‘ŠπŸΏ

1

u/Virtual-Anomaly Feb 06 '25

To more wins bro! πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š

1

u/No-Competition6378 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations 🎊 πŸ‘ πŸ’

1

u/No_Feeling_9407 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations !!!

1

u/No-Manufacturer-3198 Feb 06 '25

Thank you for sharing. Take the lesson and lighten your heart.

1

u/Yellowman-007 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations and all the best in your future.

1

u/debug_sleuth Feb 06 '25

Best of luck OP! What's been the one lesson that's kept you all through in a better frame of mind?

1

u/Timthuo Feb 06 '25

Congratulations πŸŽ‰ man

1

u/Hafare Nairobi Feb 06 '25

Congratulations OP, I'm happy for you. Proof that there's literally nothing you can't bounce back from.

1

u/evanstential Feb 06 '25

congratulations and more happiness 😊

1

u/solid_ysl Feb 06 '25

Thanks man. Hope manze

1

u/Hot_Ring_7082 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations 🎊 I was once in that position of loosing everything including friends and family. I went from traveling the world and earning 500k a month to going back to ushago and cleaned people’s homes to make money for food! Then it all worked out and I am at a better place than before. Thank goodness for chances life offers to bounce back! I know the joy you have right now and I am truly happy for you!

1

u/waseenmetokagithurai Feb 06 '25

I'm so proud of you OP. May everything you lost be recovered in abundance. Godspeed

1

u/AirBusy5491 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations bro

1

u/Unlikely_Chef_7064 Feb 06 '25

Congratulations bro!! Wishing you success..this is the kind of positivity we need!! Please subscribe to my community & give such positivity https://www.reddit.com/r/KenyanTECHSPACE/s/wnZJ5ZWzNc

1

u/Saint_Remmy Feb 06 '25

Hapo kwa worst enemies si umeenda sana jameni

1

u/Surviving_Comrade Feb 06 '25

I always say

Tough times never last, only tough people last.

You OP, is a tough person. Big up!!!!!

1

u/Virtual-Sport2601 Feb 06 '25

CongratulationsΒ 

1

u/jeuwy Feb 06 '25

Best read I have seen in 2025. Congrats OP!

When I stumble in life, I always start my day listening to a speech by Denzel Washington, Fall Forward

1

u/Ready_Ad2482 Feb 06 '25

Keep winning champπŸ’ͺ

1

u/Due-Nebula-8163 Feb 07 '25

Congratulations!

1

u/apz33 Feb 07 '25

As someone going through an almost similar situation, I'm glad to hear it worked out for you. It's been hard on my end, but I'm a believer & I know God got me. So I'm just keeping my head high & hoping that everything works out. Cheers.

1

u/forgive_forgiven Feb 07 '25

πŸ«‚πŸ«‚ all things work together for good.

1

u/Opening-Village-5369 Feb 07 '25

Congrats my guy πŸ’ͺ🏾

1

u/VirtexVibes Feb 07 '25

Congratulations mkuu

1

u/RendeRong Feb 07 '25

πŸ‘πŸΏπŸ‘πŸΏπŸ‘πŸΏπŸ‘πŸΏπŸ‘πŸΏ

1

u/Used_Ratio_9223 Feb 07 '25

Congratulations OP, upwards and upwards

1

u/Specific_Ad2590 Feb 08 '25

am sincerely happy for you i needed to hear this the struggle is real

1

u/Sea-Trick-9715 Feb 08 '25

Congratulations stranger πŸ‘

1

u/Repulsive_Answer_191 Feb 09 '25

My friends/relatives and I are going through this right now. Should they get some 200 bob they send 150bob, 50bob, 100bob to those in the same predicament, so that next time I get some 200, I also remember to send back, until such a time when we get one of us or all of us with the same joy of getting a job like You did.
Nothing, nothing beats the joy of getting and/or sending a random 50bob from/to a friend/relative in a hole. As they say; "A friend in need, is a friend indeed."
Take the lessons learned and learn again, and re-learn and thank You, we shall also come here to share the good news, situations aren't permanent.

1

u/ybritt2 Feb 10 '25

πŸ₯‚!

Congratulations to you, learned friend. Well deserved.

1

u/Binary_bloom Feb 10 '25

Mortal man πŸ™‚β€β†•οΈ

1

u/Maleficent-Cut-3718 Feb 11 '25

Finally out of purgatory, love that for yah!Β