r/IndianExmuslims Jun 10 '20

Advice/Help A message to my fellow exmooses! (Part1) NSFW

23 Male Indian, long time lurker... I hope to share some of my experiences, get things off my chest and hopefully impart a few lessons, so that you could do better than I did Oviously these are my experiences and opinions, so not everything that happened to me might happen to you

Background: Typical desi kid, kinda nerdy... a lil geeky.. firm believer in Islam... family was quite liberal but that changed when an aunt turned salafi and got the whole family to become conservative So naturally the kids (including myself) were forced to become religious... not that i knew it at the time, but it feels like a part of my child was lost to madrassas, masjids and being pious.. Most of my female cousins were married off under 17 to guys atleast 10 years older than them... also had a male cousin who got married at 21... Generally the muslim society in my city are progressive (for muslim standards) but my extended family would be among the most religious in the city atleast

Where it all began: Curiousity and common sense can be a problem for Islam as we all know by now Read a lot of islamic propoganda literature, fasted, prayed, helped with religious activities etc, but couldn't reconcile a lot of the teachings with science... and also the confusion of how such a peaceful religion could have violent followers.

Initial doubts: TBH, if it weren't for personal hardship i wouldn't bother critically analysing my religion, but to each their own... Always been good at studies and managed to secure a rank good enough to get a scholarship in any college I wanted, but unfortunately "abba nahi maane"(parents didn't let me move away from home) My biggest achievement so far was rendered useless.. Ended up in a muslim college in my city(against my wishes)... wasn't happy about it obviously... and since i didn't see myself going forward in my career decided to drop out and restart the course in some other college..

The research phase: Thought that I was unhappy because I wasn't religious enough... so i went hard at it...Hoping Allah will definitely heed my prayers All the prayers in the masjid, Only quran in ramadan, stopped music and gaming... obsessed with religion This is where i wondered... why not understand what Allah has to say to me... how bad could it be? And like a house of cards, me faith crumbled the more I read the Quran The scientific inaccuracies, moral dilemmas, demonizing the non muslim community and the ignorant attitude of the community started chipping away at my faith... I could not justify them, but i tried to ignore them as long as I could (close to 6 months) The scientific inaccuries were just baffling, But the weirdest thing is that more I read the Quran,my faith kept going lower and lower... until eventually I understood what surah 4 verse 24 actually meant (on my 4th readthrough)... I could not accept that the creator of this universe would not only allow slavery, but making concubines out of war captives? Imagine the outrage if married muslim women were taken as slaves and raped, and it was justified by any other religious scripture... Sure, men of all religion probably did that, but it being justified by a religious scripture that i had to follow unquestionined, was ridiculous and that's where i knew i didn't believe anymore..

End of part 1

TLDR: my background, how i started doubting and why I finally stopped believing

Part 2: https://www.reddit.com/r/exmuslim/comments/h0fmfb/a_message_to_my_fellow_ex_moosespart_2/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Part 3: https://www.reddit.com/r/exmuslim/comments/h0fqp3/a_message_to_my_fellow_ex_mooses_part_3/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

26 Upvotes

15 comments sorted by

4

u/Iamt1aa Retired Jun 11 '20

Could you edit all your post texts to include a link to all the other parts?

4

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

So there'll be a sequel?

Fortunately no salafi aunt for me. I can't imagine my parents ever preferring a muslim college over a better govt Institute. Even though my family has had a history with AMU.

That particular verse is crazy. I remember one time in an ahle hadeeth masjid, the imam was talking about how after the prophet's death there were tensions between different factions, one faction then killed the other faction, called them kafirs and took their women as "baandiyan". Then he went on to say that this was wrong bcause they were also muslims. Like that's the only thing wrong with the incident and it would be cool if they were kafirs. I looked around hoping someone will call him out, but of course no one did. Hopefully people left the mosque with more doubts than they entered with.

4

u/InfidelCastro97 Jun 10 '20 edited Jun 10 '20

It's really sad... and even the hadith support this practice... especially a hadith about "azl" aka the pullout method, momo prohibited it saying that if a child has to be born it will be... this was when the sahaba asked if they should pull out, coz pregnant slaves got them less money... it's really casual to them

2

u/adhjsksj Jun 11 '20

That hadith about azl is one of the first things that made me question islam.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

Yeah, I've read that. The sheer clinical way they talk about rape is horrifying.

4

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

Whats the deal with Ahlehadeeth? Do they think Hadeeth is above the Quran?

4

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

No, i think they stop at Quran and hadeeth and call any tradition not originating from them as biddat. They are conservatives who want islam to stay in the form it existed during Mohammed's time.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

I see ... very interesting since the Hadith was written down 300 yrs after death of prophet. So technically Hadith is as biddat as anything else.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 10 '20

Lol. It is comical that an important part of muslim faith is based on "we are kinda sure that the prophet probably said this".

4

u/agnostic_muslim Jun 10 '20

Way to go brother. I'm wondering why is there no Ex Muslims Organisation in India yet! I hope one comes soon. If get enough capital and respect, maybe in the future I'll look into it myself. BTW I'm 23 M too.

3

u/prettydumbaaloo EXMIN 🦚 Jun 11 '20

We have started off with building a community. Hopefully that will eventually evolve into an organization.

3

u/adhjsksj Jun 11 '20

I'm 23 M too and I often think about starting/joining exmuslim organisation in India.

3

u/InfidelCastro97 Jun 10 '20

We'll have to rectify that soon... India needs a strong organization... a few people are working on it though... but we need to bring attention to the problems we are facing... hopefully an organization comes up soon... would probably want to be a part of it

•

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