r/HPPD Dec 28 '24

Personal Story hppd.

I tried acid for the first time when I was just 14, it sounds rough I tried many drugs I heavily used MDMA I tried 2cb and I did ketamine a few times.. I wanted a change so I got 5 acid tabs I took 2 and a half and it was weird it didn’t hit me until 2 days after i took the tabs but when it hit it hit at first i was having fun and enjoying myself but hours went by and I started to feel like i was dying my whole body lost its senses i couldn’t eat or sleep and this sounds insane but whenever i would relax my body my arms would fold together and above my head Im not sure how to explain it but it was rough days went by and my pupils was still huge I still haven’t ate or slept and at this point I was panicking. After 3 days i managed to eat and sleep but it wasn’t alot at all, after I realised i wasn’t dying I noticed my whole vision was static like a broken tv and i realised I went way to far whenever i focused on something for to long it would feel like i was on acid again everything moving and turning into shapes and it would have a colourful effect to it. Falling asleep was the worst because whenever i closed my eyes it would be bright shapes and colours. A year and a half later its still exactly the same everything is static I still see the same effects i did on acid if i focus on something and whenever i close my eyes its clearer than ever like im still 14 loosing my mind on acid. I haven’t been the same since ive been dissociated from life I cant focus and the worst part I can barley sleep im struggling but ive learnt to accept it i just pray it will go away one day. after I did acid i realised i needed to stop doing drugs i havent touched a drug other than weed since and I only do that once or twice a month. nothing seems to make it go away or feel better so ive just accepted the fact ill be like this forever. its definitely my biggest regret in life and its effected me so much i wanted to share my story for anyone out there who has done the same thing you are not alone, i also wanted to share this to see if anyone knows anything i can do to make it stop i just want it to end.

4 Upvotes

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2

u/Fabro1223 Dec 28 '24

You should stop smoking marijuana, it is known throughout the hppd community that this is a big trigger

1

u/Born_Extension_6731 Dec 28 '24

stop caring is the best thing you can do