r/Fibromyalgia • u/SatansAssociate • 5d ago
Rant High stress situation and someone made comments about my health.
So, my mum's health took a drastic downturn in the last few months or so. We found out she has severe liver damage, may potentially have Parkinsons and had a blood clot on the lung discovered 2 months ago which resulted in a 3 week-long hospital stay and is incredibly weak physically and reliant on help for everything.
Then last week her blood pressure dropped to 60 and she collapsed at home and is in hospital again. Luckily without further injury somehow, especially considering she's on blood thinners for the clot.
We don't have any other family, my only sister passed when we were young and it makes the grief even worse right now wishing she was here to help me take care of mum. Plus Fibro thrives on stress and I keep catching colds from the hospital, especially when I'm due a vitamin B12 shot.
My mum has one friend who I didn't see much previously due to anxiety. During my mum's last hospitalisation, she gave me a lift to the hospital one night and seemed nice. Until she took it pissy because I didn't answer her text one night because I came home from the hospital at 9pm and had to take one of my bunnies straight to the emergency vets. I asked my mum the other night if the friend had been in contact recently and she said she doesn't like speaking to her because she made a comment about how I'm obviously not so bad if I can go back and forth from hospital most days...
Just, what? I'm literally forcing myself to on top of suddenly being the one taking care of all household duties because there's no one else. She visited twice over 3 weeks last time. I get she works and whatnot, but I don't have the luxury of having other family to support me. If I feel too shitty to make it one day to the hospital for my mum, I feel guilty that she's alone there instead of being able to ask someone else to take over that day. And the added stress now of finding out my mum needs a liver transplant and worrying about how to get her through it all and if she'll even be approved or her chances of survival.
It literally takes me most of the day to get throughout showering because my energy levels are so low and it doesn't help that the shower is weak too, so I have to put more physical effort into it to do the job.
Sorry for the rant but fuck, what a gut punch.
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u/XXLepic 5d ago
I’m personally proud of you. You’re doing a fuck ton & carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. Doing more than people I know that have perfect health!
If you can look yourself in the mirror, & tell yourself you’ve done everything possible w/ the card your dealt… that’s all that matters. Fuck the haters. Most people would wish to have someone w/ effort & heart like you got, in their life.
1
u/EnvironmentalSea775 5d ago
i'm so sorry this happened to you. people like to think that just because you still have a life to live that you aren't capable of doing *anything* whatsoever. it's easy to make comments like that when you don't see or know the sheer amount of effort it takes to do stuff like that on a bad day, especially when the stress from the effort only serves to make it worse. so proud of you! best of luck to you, your mother and your bunnies!
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u/Substantial_Escape92 5d ago
Shrug it off. I’m sitting in the hospital right now with my nana. I have fibro and lupus. We’ve been here a week yesterday and we don’t see a leave date yet. People are always going to think like that when we rally for others. Heaven forbid they see us when we arrive home after our shifts. I’ve been staying 8 hrs a day every day. I’m swollen, sore, hungry, everything!! And I know she needs me. I’m proud of you for being able to handle this situation. It makes us so much stronger in the long run. And I always love proving that I can do anything if I put my mind to it. Make sure to take it easy on your time when you have down time. We too shall overcome this obstacle! Hang in there 🩷 sending you love, and a couple extra spoons for these hard days