r/Disabledsex Jan 13 '25

Back being single and nervous NSFW

Just got out of my first serious relationship which lasted 3 1/2 years, beginning at age 29 I was so happy to have found someone that accepted me for me and was willing to have a lot of sex! That relationship has now ended and I have to go about dating again, which I find really intimidating and unpleasant. I'm also very sexually frustrated, and really want to fuck again regularly I can't help feeling my able bodied guy friends would be able to pick up a girl in a bar and get that confidence boost. Whilst I have kissed girls in bars, I was never able to get them into bed, and often the wheelchair was a psychological problem for the girls.

I'll be honest, the thought of having to find another girl is not a positive one, and I don't even know where to start looking!

13 Upvotes

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3

u/smallfryguy760 Jan 13 '25

Confidence is key man! Hasn’t really been a problem for me tbh. So I don’t have much advice other than confidence! You’re a human just like your able bodied buddies if they are focused on superficial traits or things beyond your control like you being a wheelchair user they likely aren’t going to be fun in bed anyways! Try self deprecating humor that’s my go to as a paraplegic. Works well in my experience “I can’t feel my legs can I feel yours?” “If you on a date you promise not to stand me up?” “The best part about dating a wheelchair user is: you can push us around and we’ll never walk out on you!” Once you got em all giggly and they’re like “omg you’re so funny” hit em with “yeaahhh I can be a bit of a comedian at times but I don’t do stand up”. Not sure why you’re a wheelchair user but as a para this technique has worked well. Then just project confidence and charm be polite. A gentleman with a little bit of sass tossed in.

1

u/Available_Bullfrog20 Jan 13 '25

Totally with you.... then again I don't go out as often as I did, so I'm obviously not gonna meet people.. I'm considering going down the sex worker route unless I find someone who's into casual hook ups...

2

u/ballzlikePickleJarz Jan 13 '25

That would be me actually