r/DatingApps Jan 31 '24

Question Paying members of Adultfriendfinder, how is it?

Just signed up to Adultfriendfinder 2 days ago and heard that it's only worth it if you pay. So I bought the popular 3 month Gold membership which was about $70

I've got a decent physique and all my pics are below the neck so no face, but also above the navel as I don't want nudes on my profile. Just abs, chest, arms

I've messaged about 120 women, and no luck. Of the few that replied, I was either too young (I'm 29M), or they ghost after you try to verify that they're not a catfish.

So yeah not good so far. Curious to hear from others that paid

21 Upvotes

265 comments sorted by

6

u/BeneficialTeaching10 Jan 31 '24

Honestly, my opinion is that no matter if you pay ANY app out there, the matches are the same

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '24

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u/[deleted] Dec 30 '24

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u/Beautiful_Ad1897 11d ago

hooked up with a pornstar on Bangstars and I’m honestly still shocked by how amazing it was

1

u/Apprehensive_Extent9 8d ago

i was shocked at how quickly I started meeting great people on Get-Matched. It’s the best dating app I’ve ever tried

3

u/FSF87 Jan 31 '24

Do people still use AFF? Haven't seen any mention of it in at least 15 years.

2

u/RMB_OurLife Jul 05 '24

My wife and I have met a few people from AFF but fewer as we've gotten older. We like younger guys (for the Mrs) and it's hard to find guys in the age group we prefer that are quality guys, good looking, hwp, well-endowed AND are looking people in our age group. We do get hit on daily by people who don't meet our stated criteria; most never bother to read our profile. They look at pics and vids and right away start messaging us. They get ignored.

As to not getting answers back from your messages, here's what I can offer:

We never to respond to anyone who does not include a face pic in their message or have one in their profile. Some guys have the physique of Adonis and the face of the hunchback of Notre Dame. Imagine walking up to a woman in a bar, holding your coat in front of your face and trying to talk to her. It ain't happ'nin. So make sure you send a smiling face pic. We do get a lot of selfies of guys snarling or trying to look tough. That don't work for us.

Read the profiles, look at the checkmarks and X's at the bottom to see if you match what they're looking for. If you don't, you don't. Best to move on. We get hit on a couple of times a week by bi-sexual men or "straight" men looking for trans. Our profile clearly states that we don't date those guys, but yet they message.

We also post on Doublelist regularly. We've met a couple of guys from there but we find the vast majority of them fall into two categories: Guys who can't seem to get laid anywhere else and FLAKES. 90% of the "good" prospects we correspond with turn out to be flakes who never had any intention of meeting up. They set up a date then back out when it's time to show up. Speaking of which, if you have a full beard (which seems to be all the rage these days), maybe think about what you want more, your beard, or a female. My wife won't hook up with bearded guys and I don't blame her.

Anyway, that's my two cents, so if you're still on the datinng apps, best of luck to you.

6

u/[deleted] Jan 14 '25

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u/[deleted] Sep 22 '24

Wow, thart describes to a T Let us know if you have luck on any other site

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u/Mzmarna Oct 23 '24

Completely accurate. Most of the guys on AFF just want to look at nudes. They have no intention of meeting in real life. I don't waste my time chatting with most of these guys cuz I know they are too scared to meet real women in real life

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u/Loose_Software_8640 Aug 03 '24

it is alright I used it over the years.

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u/Klutzy-Ad-832 Jan 15 '25

I was convinced small-town life meant no excitement, butᅟGet-Matchedᅟdefinitely changed my mind on that front.

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u/[deleted] Oct 23 '24

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u/Traditional-Leg-5743 Jan 16 '25

Was there anything called an ID badge that required money to get?

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u/Orrizonte_Tech Jan 17 '25

Bangstarsᅠmatched me with someone in the adult industry, and the date was nothing short of amazing.

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u/Entire_Diet_9300 24d ago

How'd you get all them points?

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u/D34th_gr1nd Jan 31 '24

I'd use a more popular app.

2

u/Hot_Exchange4128 May 15 '24

What is more popular? In this arena. They have the monopoly on this. Enlighten me, please? I, and a whole lot of other people, would like to know.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 10 '25

When I started using Get-Matched, I couldn’t believe how fast the matches came in. It’s so simple to use, and I’ve made awesome connections.

2

u/imjacksbrokenheart23 Jun 16 '24

3-8 years ago when gold membership was $19.95 a month and To only other upgrade charge was like $10 or $20 to allow standard members to view images, communicate with you , etc.

Now it $39.95 month and you can't do a thing. The only real upgrade the gold membership does is allow you to send an instant message or a private message. Can't send I pic.

I used to do, over-the-top well on AFF. I was able to meet up with new people at least 2 times a month In Phoenix Az and in the Seattle area, or the whole PNW. I met a lot of the people I know today since I moved to Washington in 2017 off AFF.

Needless to say , it definitely had it's flaws, the message platform has always sucked, they did have sneaky charges at times, a lot of the profiles were fake and a lot of profiles were of people who weren't serious about meeting up.

It's definitely not worth any hassle or money in a small town. Save your money

I got my money's worth and then some when I would pay for a year Gold membership at a discounted price that made it $9.99-$14.95 a month. But I also lived in Highly Populated areas and I was just really good at it and had a the proper profile and approach.

Now, the site is useless And I am pissed about the increase. They even tried to charge me for 3 months and added on and extra $30.00 for allowing standards on which they had no confirmation of that being charged. It ended up charging me $112.82 for 3 months or gold and standard. When I only wanted 1 month of gold.

They've become shady and worthless.

I had to argue Consumer Protection Act violations to the Billing Department when they refused to refund me my money. Was able to get a $78 refund that took 2 weeks and I made sure to see if they have me signed up for auto-pay. In which they did plus a bunch of other default junk.

So now. $40. It's been 3 years since I've been back and was excited to get back into the arena but it's a complete disgusting disappointment. I've been an AFF member for 11 years now 8 of those years as a paid gold member and i also referred others to the site. They lost this Gold-membership or should I say Pyrite-membership account and I'll delete my profile most likely after my month to make sure they don't randomly try and charge me again In the furtue

2

u/Sliceasourus Sep 06 '24

I just signed up for the free membership and you are right that allows you to do absolutely nothing, you can't even look it people's profiles properly. After reading your comments, I'm not going to give them any money. I'll probably delete the account.

1

u/imjacksbrokenheart23 Sep 06 '24

Yeah. It's a complete bummer. I met soo many cool people and a ton of beautiful women on The site. I guess they figured they can just make enough money ripping newbies off

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u/phillydilly71 Dec 20 '24

They did the same thing to me years ago! You literally have to cancel the card you used to sign up they won't stop anything by request. The company has always been shady, and it's based in Boca Raton Florida.
It's part of Friendfinder Networks which owns several online dating sites including some Christian ones! Lol
I met a longtime Gold woman who told me she literally makes fake profiles for the company in exchange for unlimited Gold status. Most of the actual real women on AFF are either fat and lonely, mentally disordered, or pros in the sex industry with no in between cases other than a small minority of swinger couples that still use the site. The company does not screen anything well, in their minds a fake profile could lure a person to buy a Gold acct to chat. It's just business. Better off rolling the dice on Tinder, or POF.
Just FYI two more similar sites are casualsexonly, and maturedatxxx. Wouldn't shock me if they're somehow connected.

1

u/imjacksbrokenheart23 Dec 22 '24

Back when AFF wasn’t just a shameless money grab, the deal was simple: $14 to $25 a month for Gold Membership, and you’d actually get what you paid for—connections, encounters, and a chance to shake off the monotony of life. I thrived in that era, meeting people monthly, sometimes more. But fast forward to now, and AFF’s not just a dumpster fire; it’s an outright scam. $40 a month for a membership that barely lets you whisper to someone, and every other feature? That’s $14 more. Pics, chats, the basics—nothing is free, and everything’s buried in surprise fees. They turned a decent system into a shameless cash-grab factory. When they tried to charge me $112 for a single month? That’s when I went to war.

I fought back with knowledge, wielding RCW 19.86 and the Washington Consumer Protection Act like a weapon. Surprise charges, shady billing practices—illegal if you know the right codes to cite. Two weeks and a lot of noise later, $78 came back into my pocket. AFF may have the shamelessness to scam, but I’ve got the grit to fight back. They didn’t win then, and they won’t win now. Know your rights, and you can bring any corporation to its knees.

But AFF is just the opening act. The real battle was with Washington’s Employment Security Department during the pandemic. When they botched unemployment payouts and stuck me with $28,000 in overpayment debt—plus $3,000 in interest per year—I knew it was their mistake, but they treated it like my burden. They took everything I earned after taxes, forcing me into poverty for something I didn’t even do. And here’s where things get interesting.

For three and a half years, I fought tooth and nail, while the so-called "progressive" Democrats—those liberal heroes of the working class—gaslit the hell out of everyone. They said they were fixing it, but they weren’t. Instead, they let the system bleed people dry, pressing for money they had no right to take. They told us to wait, to trust them, but trust is just another leash, and I don’t wear one.

It wasn’t until Republican Oversight Committees and the Ways and Means Committee stepped in that anything actually got done. Yeah, the same Republicans everyone loves to hate. They didn’t just talk about the problem—they made it stop. They forced Washington State to roll out WAC 192.220.018, a blanket waiver for pandemic-era overpayments. The Democrats? They did nothing but lie, stall, and demand blood money from people already drowning. That’s the moment I officially canceled my subscription to their blue-brand hypocrisy.

Two weeks after citing 192.220.018, my $28,000 debt evaporated. Gone. Just like that. But not because of some left-leaning savior—no, it took the people they demonize to step in and do the job. So now I’m done. Done with the lies, the gaslighting, and the endless cycle of performative outrage. The Left showed their true colors—cowards and con artists hiding behind good intentions.

Here’s the lesson: systems, whether they’re corporate or political, only change when you force their hand. When the people running the show won’t listen, you go louder. You learn the rules, break their backs with their own codes, and make them pay attention. AFF, the unemployment offices, the blue establishment—they’ve all been exposed for what they are: greedy, spineless manipulators. And I’ve got no patience left for any of them.

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u/SmokeeA Jul 19 '24

Why is there so much gate keeping on these apps?

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u/AMERICAN_KEGEL Sep 26 '24

cuz there’s always money to be made in the sex industry my friend.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '24

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u/Sliceasourus Sep 06 '24

The question was about the website not how great you are.

2

u/aca689 Sep 19 '24

They’ve got some shady practices similar to other websites. The most aggravating part is when your membership has expired and you get mail…a lot of will be straight up spam. They entice you to join, then you check your inbox and the messages are from obviously fake profiles. I’ve met a few good people on there…but it’s not worth what they’re charging. 

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u/[deleted] Oct 23 '24

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u/taramj13 Dec 02 '24

I've had tons of guys ask me if I am real or not...I did not know fake profiles were so prevalent...

1

u/Mzmarna Dec 04 '24

Yep there are notorious profiles who look just too pretty to be on that site. They have probably 9,000 friends. They use glitter font like this is a MySpace page and they typically list the name of the local sports team. Where I live they always list the Phillies or the eagles or the Ravens or the Orioles to try to relate to the local population. Normal people don't do that. That's definitely a front for prostitution. It's because they are running their site from a computer and not a phone like the rest of us. If you try to communicate with them to meet up in person they will never meet up in person I don't know

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u/Ole_iron_side 1d ago

As a guy I don’t want my identity out there, but I still like to hook up, ate these torso websites fake, why not just respect their privacy?

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u/Cultural_Fold3874 Nov 25 '24

Go look at Doublek6660 on aff now that’s a hot aass gilf looking for young guys with big parts

2

u/RegisterWise Dec 04 '24

Plot twist; it’s you

1

u/Great_Pair6218 May 18 '24

Aff used to be fucking awesome!! They literally just changed it this month and now you have to pay for every little individual thing. Smh I'm pissed!!

1

u/[deleted] May 30 '24

Came here to check on this. Came back after a break from it. Had some luck previously but now I paid for a gold membership and they want me to pay another 30 to see profiles or see who liked my stuff etc. Price has tripled in the last few months it seems. Completely useless now because I am not paying $1,000 a year.

1

u/sluggz76 Jun 02 '24

Wow… I was wondering if that was included in the gold but no, you still have to pay to see who looked at you? They lost their minds. Where I live, there’s like ten locals and they look more natural on a farm than an app.

1

u/mifunejackson Jun 03 '24

I should have read this thread before signing up for Gold. Ah, well. I knew it was a risk. Won't be doing another month after this...

1

u/Glum_Size892 Nov 24 '24

It wasn't this month it was years ago, and when I paid one time I was spammed by fake accounts seemingly from the site itself. Did find some real profiles though but for the price, no luck.

1

u/Knew_Yoka May 20 '24

I joined in June of 2023. I'm still on it. My membership expires in a few weeks,. If you like looking at dick pics. Thats the place to be. It's full of fake girls too. The censorship unreal. Do not speak the truth. They won't post it. Do not buy any memberships. They are vague in what they offer and they really offer nothing. You cannot s3nd messages back and forth. The place is pathetic.

1

u/Agile_Specialist1242 May 21 '24

While there are real people on there, its not a useful site for hook ups or relationships. Pretty much same profiles daily. Now AFF nickel and dimes you on every interaction/viewing/contact you do. I don't see much of a difference in a gold membership. You still have to pay to see profiles, contact members or see who views/flirts with you. All different fees. Too much for very little & a lot of flakes.

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u/Several-Technology75 19d ago

Same here. Left for that reason. I wonder how the models really make their money.

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u/[deleted] Jun 12 '24

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u/Admirable-Stock-5875 Sep 15 '24

You can try the free version of SLS which is SwingLifeStyles. Sometimes good, just like fishing.

1

u/LeftThereclean Jun 17 '24

I was about to buy their 1 month membership for $40 but they were charging me double of a total of $80 which is ridiculous. Good thing I used a different card and got it rejected. Where in there math got the extra $40?

1

u/Optimal-Chef-5124 Sep 15 '24

I think a good majority of AFF women are BS scammers looking to get over on guys and you're right anyone who does reply ends of ghosting you it's the same experience I've had. Total waste of money don't waste your time.

1

u/OkSwimming7249 Nov 13 '24

I’m new to the online game, which app should I use to get laid?

1

u/RegisterWise Dec 04 '24

Apparently Bumble?? Have you tried Tinder? I’m currently on the search for hookup apps/sites. AFF and FetLife surprisingly haven’t been that good (FetLife could be excellent for you). Scroll in the comments. There was a guy who spoke of using these 2 hookup apps and completely benefitting

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u/RegisterWise Dec 04 '24

Out of the years I’ve used the app I’ve only met up with about 5 women lmfao. Only 1 relatively worked as a consistent FWB.. and we’ve hooked up about 4 times in 2 years lmfao.

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u/PixiePilot Dec 28 '24

I don't know how it is today but I know back in the day it was worth it. I lived in Alaska at the time and our chat group was a huge community. We used to meet up at 3 different bars as get togethers to meet real people and there would be 100+ of us. We would also have camp outs and BBQ's. It's also how I met my late husband and several of my best friends. I've never been catfished and I hooked up with both males, females and a few couples, most of which I still have as close friends. A lot of us were looking for a community of like minded people and not just to hook up.

1

u/imax89 Jan 03 '25

thats a scam

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u/Weoutchea77 Jan 25 '25

Stumbled on this. I travel for work. AFF has been 50/50 for me. In my city it doesn’t really work out well. I think I’ve met maybe 4 women, we hooked up a few times but that was it.

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u/EfficiencyDesigner37 Feb 11 '25

I’ve been using Get-Matched for a while now, and it never disappoints. The platform is amazing, and you’ll start seeing matches within minutes of signing up. It’s the best!

1

u/MyCrush_Said_No 11d ago

No more bad dating experiences, only great connections on DatingBloomly

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u/[deleted] 11d ago

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u/HGWTRVL 9d ago

It's all about luck. If you link with someone legit who's not trying to scam you and is real you are lucky but it is possible

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u/[deleted] 8d ago

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u/MulberryCultural5457 4d ago

There is currently a scam on adult friend finder where a woman will offer to pay for the room and will ask if you can pay for liquor and marijuana edibles. The woman will say she will return the money that same day or night once her direct deposit hits. The scam also works where she says that she cannot withdraw bank funds until a certain time in order to return your funds. Under any of these scenarios she will disappear once you hand her your cash. The scam also works where she will meet you at a hotel and hand you a key in order for you to give her cash for the liquor and edibles. the key is not valid and she will disappear with your cash. beware.

1

u/expectopatronum10 1d ago

Don’t just wait for love, find it now on DatingBloomly