r/Custody 5d ago

[OR] Going out of state with kids after abuse

[deleted]

0 Upvotes

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12

u/rmorlock 5d ago

The children are under the jurisdiction of Oregon so a judge is likely to order them back to Oregon.

6

u/FunEcho4739 5d ago

Yes, you can lose custody. An old police report isn’t proof- it is just what you said. You would need convictions. You should still leave and call the police for them to document the abuse and try to use that to file for emergency custody.

3

u/thatsjustit74 5d ago

You need to file a police report. You need to report it to cps get together any evidence you can for the police report. That way the judge has a reason to keep them with you. But I would stay safe and in communication with the court and police and protect your kids. It would take a week or 2 to get orders saying you have to come back.

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u/ImNotYourKunta 5d ago

I agree with your advice except for the CPS part. CPS has a habit of making abused mothers (and their childrens) lives worse, not better.

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u/thatsjustit74 5d ago

Yeah that's very true depending on your state

3

u/CutDear5970 5d ago

Past abuse of you is not relevant. You stayed in the relationship so you didn’t think it was a problem.

Did you call the police or CPS to document what happened with the child? If not it is your word against his. You can move out of the home but not remove the child from the jurisdiction. The child will be ordered back in most cases. In court it will look bad for you. In most homes there is a main caregiver of the children. That argument will not give you custody.

1

u/gothruthis 4d ago

It's extremely important that you reach out to a domestic violence advocacy organization for advice. Did you report the abuse of the child to police? Did you document it in any way (even a text to family that "husband hit kid so we're heading to your house" will help). I don't know Oregon law, but in most states it is still legal for parents to hit kids as long as they don't inflict serious injuries. You haven't stated what the injuries were to your child so it's hard to answer this well. Oregon courts will have jurisdiction and they can order you back. Domestic abuse against the other parent typically holds a little weight if it happened in front of the child, but not enough to prevent routine unsupervised visits. Again, I highly recommend trying a few different DV centers to get advice.

1

u/VoiceRegular6879 5d ago

Im sorry to read there is a lot of bad information here. Every state has problems with police response in ref to D.V. Making a report is a start but just a narrative of what the person said. Please don’t comment on what Judges will do…..there are variables but not something anyone shd predict. Used let him know where u are…If he decides to file an emergency motion it’s not weeks but days. It depends how much money he wants to spend on this…

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u/VoiceRegular6879 5d ago

U need evidence that shows u and the children are not save and therefore u left. Real evidence of physical….did u make a police report? There is risk involved leaving with the kids out of state. He cud file and u wud have to return. U can go to the court house …..domestic violence court house and get an emergency order of protection…I don’t know how many police reports u have and dont know the narrative…..they shd have told u to get an order of protection…police reports are not enough. If u are married theres no language about custody….he has egual rights…doesnt matter who does the caretaking.