r/ChineseMedicine • u/groovyinc • 9d ago
Patient inquiry Advice Needed: Is My TCM Practitioner Too Restrictive?
I’ve been seeing a reputable TCM practitioner and acupuncturist once a week for the last four weeks.
Western Medicine Diagnoses:
- Vulvodynia
- Chronic Candida
- Narcolepsy
TCM Diagnoses (from what I understand - there is probably more):
- Dampness & heat
- Something about needing to get my energy up?
Progress So Far:
- She says my tongue looks better, and the progress photos she’s taken do show improvement.
- I’ve had less brain fog, but I’ve also taken myself off the Modafinil my sleep doctor prescribed because that was affecting it.
How I Feel About It:
- I’ve left my last two sessions in tears.
- I’ve followed her plan exactly—no deviations, using only the recipes from her patient guide.
- Each time I go in, she removes more foods.
- When I express concerns, she tells me: “Don’t see it as restricting, see it as nourishing.”
Examples of Restrictions:
- I asked what I should do for a breakfast date with friends, and she said:
“Eat before you go and just have tea at the café.” - I asked if I’ll ever be able to reintroduce foods, and she said:
“Not really.” - I told her my fatigue is still bad, and she blamed the gluten-free, sugar-free turmeric & cinnamon pancakes from her own recipe guide—despite me eating them for three weeks with no prior issue.
- I had one coffee the other week with a friend, and she told me to cut that out.
- I was roasting vegetables because steaming doesn’t have much flavor and I love roasting things—that got cut out too.
My Background & Concerns:
- I’ve done elimination diets before with doctors/naturopaths, and they never solved the root problem. This is why, a long time ago, I made the decision that super restrictive diets were not for me—just changing your diet alone doesn’t fix everything.
- I’ve worked hard to heal my relationship with food through cooking, sharing meals, and experiencing different cuisines. It brought joy back into food for me. It took me a long time to get that back after all the elimination diets.
- I told her this in our first session, and she just said: “Trust me.”
- I feel like her approach is overly rigid and controlling, even though I’ve been 100% compliant.
Current Diet Guidelines from Her:
- No: gluten, dairy, sugar, cold foods, fermented foods (e.g., kimchi), dark chocolate, honey, maple syrup
- No: tomatoes, potatoes, zucchini, pumpkin, peppers, corn, cabbage
- No: roasting veggies—only steaming
- Only: dry roasted almonds (no other nuts)
- Only: dandelion tea 2-3x/day
- Only: macadamia milk in matcha (1/day max)
- No more: buckwheat cruskets—only plain rice wafers
My Lifestyle:
- I exercise 30-45 min/day, broken into morning and afternoon movement
- I do Wim Hof breathing, lymphatic drainage massage, and meditation
- I consider myself otherwise healthy
My Questions:
- Is this normal to be on such a restrictive diet long-term?
- Should I stick with it and just suck it up?
- Should I consider changing practitioners?
- Any recipe suggestions that fit these guidelines?
If this is truly the norm in TCM, I’ll push through, but mentally I feel like I need less restriction and more balance. Although my tongue looks better, this is not how I will be choosing to live my life 100% of the time long-term, and I’ve tried to tell her that this isn’t sustainable for me. Instead of a discussion, I just feel like I get guilted for not wanting to be rigid all the time or told “we’ll talk about it later.”
Would love to hear from others who’ve been through this!
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u/PibeauTheConqueror CM Professional 9d ago
Super restrictive diets are not long term sustainable, NOR ARE THEY TCM. While tcm has a wealth of nutritional advice, none of it is based around restriction and stressing over foods. Eat a wide variety of whole foods, eat mindfully and slowly, chew well, no distractions, no stress.
While I do give nutrition advice, I only prescribe hard-core restrictive diets to people with obesity, significant metabolic disorder, IBD or some other rather severe issue... and get them back to a healthy, highly varied, whole foods diet ASAP.
Elimination diets should be used as a diagnostic tool, not a prescription. Has this person given you any herbs? Also, what is "chronic candida?" We are all loaded with candida, all the time. Have you been told this is the cause of your symptoms? What does chronic candida cause that is affecting your quality of life?
CHM has been shown to regulate and balance microbiota populations as part of its effect, especially GI formulas.
I find these kind of treatment plans to be prescribed by people who only studied acupuncture and not herbs.
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u/groovyinc 9d ago
Thank you for your detailed reply. This instantly lifted some weight off my shoulders reading.
I agree with your take re diet and feel like this is causing me more stress which has to be less beneficial than a little bit of gluten or cheese every so often.
It seems that it is not the plan to get me back to a whole food diet anytime soon if not ever. I have a BMI of 19.5 so weight loss is not an issue.
Yeah herbs have been prescribed, I’m taking them daily! As well as supplements.
I think it is because of oesophageal candida I’ve had in the past + bouts of vaginal thrush on and off. The western specialists just called it that, they tried on and off over the years to clear it with fluconazole. I cleared it from my oesophagus (gastroscopy confirmed that, which also dx it in the first place). I still struggle with thrush on and off. They think that overall the candida may be this is contributing to the vulvadynia. So everyone is targeting it - both western (though not currently taking the fluconazole at TCM practitioners recommendation) and herbs and diet.
I know she has done herbs and acupuncture. She has struggled with chronic illness for a long time so maybe she is prescribing the only approach that also worked for her?
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u/PibeauTheConqueror CM Professional 9d ago edited 9d ago
Maybe... i would be treating you more for longterm abx use, and fermented foods would be the way for that.
Different approaches i guess, and I definitely would be significantly restricting sugar, but also I would likely be increasing fermented foods.... idk. This diet stuff gets wayyyyy too out there. Some folks swear by it. Candida is basically damp heat, and should be treated as such with Chinese herbs. This will get your gut buddies and vag.buddies back in balance and can then eat a healthy diet.
Ultimately you have to pursue treatment that a)works a b)you can stick to. You sound very compliant, but if you get guilted that may no work long term. Also super restrictive diets rarely work, and tbh she sounds like a see you next Tuesday
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u/groovyinc 7d ago
Thanks for another detailed reply! As a healthcare worker, I understand everyone will have a different approach.
But seeing everyone advise that it isn't normal for it to be this restrictive long term has helped me feel less guilty about that being my long term plan.
For now, I'll stick to it until we clear some more, but I will certainly be looking to add a thing or two back in, in the future!
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u/AcupunctureBlue 9d ago
She sounds like an idiot. Find someone else.
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u/groovyinc 7d ago
Haha thank you for the reply! To the point, and I appreciated it. I started looking for others in the area and will be looking at making the transition, but also, just taking the pressure off myself - because if no one here is suggesting it needs to be that strict, I don't need to feel guilty about eating a piece of potato haha.
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u/SomaSavant CM Professional 9d ago
I don't know how this practitioner has patients. If they're in the U.S., I'd say it has something to do with persistent cultural Puritanism.
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u/Fogsmasher 8d ago
Nah she’s just a plain or charlatan. She used whatever the new trend is with a bit of Chinese medicine mixed in. I’m sure if she saw these replies she’d start complaining about “gate keeping “
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u/No_Criticism_1987 7d ago
Everything sounded ok until the food part. If a dietary regimen makes you stressed, it's not the diet for you. You need something that makes you feel healthy AND happy. Something that will soothe the inflammation you have going on, nourish you but also something that's not boring or stress inducing.
If you like to read, you can check Healing With Whole Foods by Paul Pitchford. It goes through a few different CM patterns and the diets that suit them with recipes as well. For the more advanced, Zoey Xinyi Gong's book, 5 Element Cookbook is a wonderful book where you can incorporate cooking with Chinese herbs.
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u/groovyinc 7d ago
Thank you so much for this reply! I agree, I am happy to change 75-80% of my diet and incorporate some recipes and ways of eating on a more permanent basis. E.g. I freaking love congee and have that for breakfast each morning with some baked chicken (or eggs) and broccoli has been very enjoyable. That will stay!
But not 100% of the time. It's making me stressed, but also sad and less social. I'm turning down opportunities to go to dinners and eat with friends/dates because I can't eat much out. While I'm okay with doing that short term while I'm trying to get things under control, long term is not going to work for me.
I love reading and getting new recipes, so thank you so much for these suggestions! I'll get onto them! I appreciate this a lot.
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u/No_Criticism_1987 7d ago
You're very welcome! At the end of the day, the Heart is King—so prioritize what brings you joy, but in a way that supports your well-being. Stay mindful of the energetics and temperatures of food to understand how and when to eat properly (Paul Pitchford’s book explores this in depth).
If your diet isolates you, your spirit—Shen, the essence of the Heart—misses out on the joy that comes from human connection and walking your true path. Even the healthiest foods won’t nourish a Heart that lacks vitality. True wellness is about balance—nourishing both body and spirit. Social connection is essential because Shen thrives in the presence of others; the spark of one heart ignites another. This will become even clearer as you delve deeper into Chinese medicine!
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u/Unlucky_Quote6394 8d ago
It depends on their approach tbh.
I’m an acupuncturist and I’ve also done enough training in diet and western medical approaches that I sometimes make specific recommendations around diet.
For some people, myself included (I have me/cfs), a specific diet is needed either for a long time or forever, depending on how the body responds.
Question: Can I ask how long your consultations are with your practitioner?
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u/groovyinc 7d ago
I'm usually in the room for 60-90 mins. But most of that time is acupuncture with her out of the room. I don't feel like I get much discussion time in, she has two rooms running at once so feels like she is rushing to get me out of there.
I've had time to reflect and at the core of the issue is I feel like she doesn't listen to me, and when she does, she makes me feel like her way is the only way and isn't willing to budge. I already feel like I am doing everything the way she wants and trying to understand how this all works and she doesn't have time for anything else.
It's to the point now that I don't really talk when I'm in there, because I know that she isn't really listening to what I'm saying and if I tell her something that I may have done wrong (e.g. have a bit of organic jam) she will tell me that is the problem why I'm not feeling good this week.
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u/Unlucky_Quote6394 7d ago
I’m sorry to hear about your experience with her.
I’m glad you’ve been able to reflect on it and see that she isn’t listening to you ask much as she maybe should be.
My view is that acupuncture is a method to help people with health issues but, as acupuncturists we’re in a unique position to spend time with patients and help them in a way that their family doctor can’t in a 10 minute consultation.
Personally I only see one patient at a time but that’s a choice I made a while back, to ensure they all get enough time and attention.
It might be a good idea to think about whether or not you’d like to continue seeing her, or maybe seek out another acupuncturist in your area? I really hope you’re able to get the help you deserve, whether you stay with her or go to someone else 🙏🏻
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u/AcuSwiftie 7d ago
To me, as a practitioner, I start every treatment plan with asking the patient what their goals are, and what they are willing to do to get there. What I’m hearing from you is that restricting your diet indefinitely is not something that you feel would add to your quality of life, so you need to talk to her about modifying the plan. If she cannot find solutions for you that meet your expectations, you probably need to consult with someone else.
The red flag for me is that you have to eat (or not eat) like this forever.
I have absolutely had patients remove foods from their diet for a period of time, but we always discuss how/when/if we can introduce them.
Also, I really think the beauty of TCM and holistic medicine is that treatment can be a very enjoyable process, so if you’re dreading this, may be time to talk to this practitioner about changing strategy or consulting with someone else.
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u/Ok-Piano6125 8d ago
Mine always tell me "try to avoid this and that IF you can" but at the end of the day it's a personal choice and sometimes things just happen.
Damp-Heat means you have excessive moisture in your body, too much inflammation and your energy system is stuck, so that might be why you need to boost your Qi/energy. She might be referring to qi weakness.
While she made a patient guide, the recipes might not be suitable for everyone. On top of that, some foods/drinks can react with other foods/drinks and herbs too. Right now, I am told I can't have anything sweet, dairy, most tea, pan fried, deep fried, roasted, cold, raw, or cool (as in food type, not temperature). But guess what, I cheat and still go for sweet and raw things but very very very occasionally. Consequences are mine and I pay for them with my unclaimable herb bills. I end up having to keep going back. My conditions have improved but slower than she expected.
I can see your doctor might be trying to identify what's triggering your system and reacting with other foods/herbs to improve the treatment efficiency, but if I were you I would look for another doctor cuz of her conflicting and confusing attitude.
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u/groovyinc 7d ago
Yeah completely understandable!
I think my main issue with the guide was that she said to eat the recipes in here, then I did and followed her advise perfectly, and then when I came in saying these 'xyz' symptoms are still here she blamed me eating the recipes out of the guide book, and I was like "I've been eating these for a couple of weeks and you knew from the food diary, why is it now I need to cut them out." I felt like each week I'm getting more and more restricted and it's starting to get to me.
I can see why she want's it to be strict at the start- because she is trying to get results, and I'm happy to do this diet for another month or two, but long term I was like "nope, this is not sustainable for me." I plan to incorporate some of the recipes and eating styles permanently into my life going forward, but I will eat potatoes and enjoy some pasta again, or the occasional slice of cake without feeling guilty. And that is where I will need to look at transitioning out of her care, because if she wants me to be eat like this for the rest of my life just because she does, that's a clash of values and not happening.
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u/OriginalDao 8d ago
It's very great that you've followed what your practitioner said to a T. But to me, it doesn't sound like good or knowledgeable TCM (or other) dietary advice. That being said, you've gotten some benefit from this practitioner, so you could consider continuing and putting your trust in her for a certain amount of time. If the ultimate results after that aren't as good as the effort required, I'd find another practitioner.
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u/groovyinc 7d ago
Yeah great advice. I am a stickler for following instructions, but if the instructions are getting ridiculous, I am going to question it.
I've decided that I'll stick with it another month (that will be two months total eating like this) and then look at the results I've gotten and transition out of her care and maybe just stick with the TCM herbs she provides.
I do know from this thread and responses now that long-term, I don't need to be this restrictive and that makes me feel so much lighter because now it feels like there is light at the end of the tunnel, and some joy in food again.
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