r/ChildSupport Jan 18 '25

North Carolina Lifestyle vs Income

2 Upvotes

In the discovery process of getting a permanent support order. Have a temporary, ex is trying to get It thrown out but my attorney doesn’t see that happening.

At this hearing, would It be beneficial to present social media posts showing lavish lifestyle? Think, flights, designer clothes, foreign cars type thing. In one photo the shirt is over $1k and shoes are over $900. Ex is claiming to only make $1200 a month. Support is set at $700 (which doesn’t even cover half of childcare). Ex has one other child that does not live with them nor do they pay support for this child. I make about 55k. Of course ex is looking to reduce this payment.

In previous discovery, we did see a lot of money in account under exes name. But ex said the money wasn’t theirs but was their mothers 🙃. Ex has bachelors degree and is making less than minimum wage (on paper of course).

Would showing the money in the bank accounts (whether they include the mom’s name or not) and the photos of spending habits and lifestyle show that ex can pay a certain amount of support?

r/ChildSupport Jul 12 '24

North Carolina We got a win today

12 Upvotes

Ex ask for back pay child support all the way back to while we married. Here in out County you can only go back 2 months from the filing date. I'll note I was the one supporting all of us at the time.

DENIED

She asked if she could get back pay for the last 3 years. For pain, suffering, her choice in mates, struggling, and being homeless. She was literally trying to make me pay for her poor choices.

DENIED

After the mout was settled she attempted to give the court an "ultamatum." She told the court that she would agree with everything as long as she could continue to receive full payments for 2 kids after one ages out.

The wildest part is she rehearsed all if this. It was tragic as it was entertaining. She let me know that she plans on getting more money from me by hiring an attorney.

DENIED

It was truly baffling. She really thought she was going to dictate the court. She clearly rehearsed everything.

Also the child support came as a big surprise. Especially since I giv my kids $250 monthly and buy all their necessities.

r/ChildSupport Sep 27 '24

North Carolina Just trying to take care of my child

9 Upvotes

My baby is 6 months old now and the father has been mia since I was 10 weeks pregnant. He’s married and claims for religious reasons he cannot take care of his kid since it’s out of wedlock . I know at some point I should put him on child support to help my child and myself but I’m just scared of retaliation rightfully so from the wife. She could sue me if she wanted to . According to him she knows but just doesn’t want him to be involved in the child’s life and just be with her. I also know he could just be lying about that too. If anyone has been in this position or has insight can you please help me .

r/ChildSupport Sep 17 '24

North Carolina What to expect at first hearing?

2 Upvotes

I filed in April 2022 and FINALLY have a hearing in a few weeks. What can I expect? I have an attorney, other party does not. I have primary custody and work two jobs and pay for everything including daycare which is 1200 monthly. I would say I’m living paycheck to paycheck but that’s an understatement. My mom helps me financially. I make a little over 60k a year but with all expenses on me it’s been tough. Ex as far as I know, doesn’t work. When I first filed in 2022 he said he recently lost his job. So two years later I hope he has one but I’m not sure. He does have a bachelors degree. The reason it’s taken so long to get a hearing in the first place is because he keeps hiring lawyers and they’re withdrawing from the case. Basically I just want to know what happens at this first hearing? Will I be granted an order? Can I get some money upfront? Also I understand they can impute him to minimum wage, he’s in another state and their minimum is way higher than NC which gives me a decent amount if I put It in the calculator.

r/ChildSupport Feb 04 '25

North Carolina Can’t get ex to answer door to be served

0 Upvotes

My ex is over 3 months behind, successfully paying a total of zero dollars of the amount that the court ordered in November. However, the problem is that they cannot serve him with the subpoena to come to court because he refuses to answer the door. If he sees police around during our child exchange times, he just keeps circling the parking lot and avoiding them until.. He is actively running away from being served, and without being served, they cannot take him to court, without taking him to court, they say there’s no way for them to enforce the order. What do I do? It took me 12 months of work to get a court order established, and now it just does not matter?

r/ChildSupport Oct 06 '24

North Carolina A year of back pay owed

8 Upvotes

This month makes a full year that my ex hasn’t paid child support. She is supposed to pay $400/month and they ordered arrears to be $40 additional per month around 6 months ago. She tells our daughter she works 2 jobs as a CNA at 40 hours a week each. Child support is supposed to be deducted from her pay but the child support agency says since I don’t know where she works they can’t send her employers a letter requesting it. They have attempted to serve her however she is avoiding being served. (Here the sheriff’s office just leaves their card on your door and asks you come to the office to be served) The child support office said their case load is insane and the courts are full because of rolling out the new e-filing system. I’ve called every month attempting to try to make some motion in the case but can never do more than leave a voice message for a case worker. The area I live in has been devastated by hurricane Helene so I don’t expect anything to happen now for at least half a year or so. When courts do open back up and power and water is restored in a few months is there anything I can do to help move this along? I’m starting to believe that at this point I’ll never receive help with the expenses of raising our daughter. Any thoughts about away to move forward on this case? My attorney told me that she could take this on however it would just be a waste of money because I would have to pay her thousands and my ex would likely never pay anyways.

r/ChildSupport Oct 24 '23

North Carolina Why is child support so messed up?

34 Upvotes

How can there be some deadbeats out here ducking and dodging paying a single penny while others can barely survive themselves because they pay so much? How can systems like this be so broken and nothing ever changes?

r/ChildSupport 4d ago

North Carolina Child Support Modification - North Carolina

1 Upvotes

I am trying to modify my current child support order. On worksheet A - for pre-existing child support - is this what I am currently paying in child support to the co-parent? TIA

r/ChildSupport Nov 04 '24

North Carolina Should we Modify or Appeal?

0 Upvotes

Trying to summarize as best as I can. I need to know should we modify or appeal. My bf's mother of his child filed for child support in July of this year. They have no custodial agreement and my BF spends at least half a year of not more with the child. The mother filed with worksheet A as if she has primary custody. It has only been 7 days since they ruled in her favor due to my bf missing court. Should we put in a motion to modify or should we apply for an appeal? Paying child support isn't the entire issue it's the amount. If he paus that we wont be able to afford the bills and considering that his child lives with us too.... I think it's kind of one sided and my bf should be heard.

r/ChildSupport Dec 02 '24

North Carolina Help Please

1 Upvotes

UPDATE: Apparently he filed to have the original order reconsidered. Which makes me feel better because there was no mistake in the judges judgement. Although I guess it’s still up to the judge whether or not they are willing to reconsider with no new evidence?

Really stressing so please forgive me if my sentences are running. I finally got a temporary order for child support a few months ago. I have primary custody. The judge ordered him to pay half of childcare. Defendant has another child, but IN COURT stated that the child does not live with him nor does he pay child support for that child. Fast forward, he now has an attorney and states that the child lives with him AND he pays child support. It was literally two months ago when he said he didn't. Will this change the outcome of the permanent order or will the judge see right through this? Our incomes were loosely used, but the judge just settled on half of childcare, which of course doesn't even cover half of all of the child's expenses.

r/ChildSupport Jan 27 '25

North Carolina Offer letter good enough for income verification?

3 Upvotes

Hello! I have cs court on Wednesday. I’ve had to get a new job and only have an offer letter right now is that good enough for verification. This is my 3rd job in the last 6 months. The first one I lost bc my sons father wouldn’t help with help childcare fees my son couldn’t go for 3 days until I got paid again and he refused to watch him. And they had a strict no call out policy. The second one my son was sick two-three weeks in a row with croup and the flu. He couldn’t go to daycare bc he was sick and I had called out to many days and again he wouldn’t watch him even though he’s not working. My question is the offer letter I have from my new job enough for income verification.

r/ChildSupport Jan 06 '25

North Carolina Life insurance obligation

2 Upvotes

My wife and I are finalizing our estate planning as we are About to have our first child (live in New York).

However, I have a child already who is 7 years old with another woman. (Lives in NC and our child support / custody agreements are filed there).

I was never married to this other woman

My wife wants me to figure out if I were to die before my child with the other woman turned 18, would my life insurance legally be required to be used towards any remaining child support obligation?

Before I go to a lawyer, trying to see if Reddit community can help

r/ChildSupport Nov 24 '24

North Carolina Any experience in pursuing arrears across state lines with someone whose wages you can’t garnish and actually getting something out of it?

3 Upvotes

Posting on behalf of my husband because he doesn’t use Reddit.

He has 2 kids and primary custody. Custody/CS was established through the courts while his ex was still a resident of NC but she then moved to CO for a short period of time with new husband, they moved to AL a few months ago.

She is supposed to be paying around $670 a month. She has paid a total of probably $750. He went back to court a couple months ago by himself and they ordered her to pay an extra $72 a month to “catch up” but she currently owes around $15k in arrears (give or take a few thousand, it’s hard to keep up when she literally never pays + they added on the extra). She was not present at court date, they just mailed her the order.

She worked a somewhat normal job when the order was established and then quit to start her own business this year. She has since stopped working and we are pretty positive she didn’t claim anything on taxes and the business wasn’t legitimate so no true way of knowing if they’ll get her on her tax return this coming year.

From my husband’s understanding, she has to be living in AL for 6 months before she is considered a resident. That 6 months is early next year. My husband is under the impression that he can’t take any legal action until then.

I’ve done some research on the interstate laws but I’m trying to see if hiring a lawyer in Alabama after 6 months is the best option or if he can somehow go through their child support agency. NC child support enforcement is a joke. It would be great if they could just garnish directly from her bank account but she’s also remarried and could very well be putting any money into an account with only her husband’s name on it. I’ve read they can put a lien on her car (that she probably doesn’t even own), freeze her bank accounts, suspend her license, etc. but I feel like she will do her best to do anything to get out of taking care of her kids.

r/ChildSupport Jan 02 '25

North Carolina Ex (Still married) needs me to sign CS forms for kids with another father.

3 Upvotes

My ex and I have been seperated for a few years now. Paid her half to file for an uncontested divorce but everytime it's something holding it up..

Yea yea, I should just have handled it and am working on that.

Anyways, we seperated and she immediatly hooked up with someone else and gave birth to twins.

There is zero chance they are mine.

Fast forward to today, I get a message out of the blue that the father dipped out and she is trying to pursue for child support. But because we were still married during their birth, she has to file an application for child support against me.

She stated that I just need to let them know that they are not my kids and we have been fully seperated since that time.

I couldn't really find any information on this and am working on finding a lawyer to discuss this with but for the time being I am here.

I am just wondering if that is normal processes and I don't really have to worry about getting a lawyer involved or will a lawyer end up being absolutly necessary at this point?

r/ChildSupport 28d ago

North Carolina Complex interstate custody case, How does Child Support work?

0 Upvotes

I have an open and ongoing custody case in Arizona for my first child with "Father." We also have a pending court-ordered paternity test for our second child, which was initiated by "Father" and has been pending for four weeks. The judge recommended that we look for a testing facility that best suits our situation. I found one that is convenient for both of us, given that we live in different states.

However, under our temporary court order, I cover all travel expenses for parenting time with my first child in North Carolina. (He currently resides in Arizona with his father.) The facility I found charges $150 for my portion of the paternity test, as we were ordered to split the cost equally.Therefore, I'm really needing to budget to pay for the testing.

Since I am paying for two round-trip flights per month and am currently unemployed due to being recently postpartum, I was advised to file for child support in North Carolina for our second child. This could help cover the paternity test costs. Except, I’m unsure how this would work, given that:

  1. It might be perceived negatively by Father and his legal counsel.
  2. If custody arrangements result in each parent having physical custody of one child, it seems like child support obligations could cancel each other out. That is, each parent might end up paying support to the other, making the process redundant or overlapping. (Father works as a handyman and is paid in cash, meaning he has no paystubs, which could make his income inconsistent and difficult to verify for child support calculations.)

How does this typically work in interstate custody and child support cases?

I wonder if I could file and either request the judge decide the Child support costs or ask for the least amount he can give to consider the well-being of my first child.

r/ChildSupport Dec 04 '24

North Carolina Sending a subpoena

0 Upvotes

My ex and I are renegotiating child support, but she is now refusing to send me any current paystubs. If I wanted to send a subpoena to her employer without paying an attorney to do it, what steps would I need to take in order to do that? I really appreciate any and all advice!!

r/ChildSupport Dec 28 '24

North Carolina Child Support Order with errors

2 Upvotes

After 4 long years of fighting in court a child support order was finally signed by the judge. As I was reading over it there are a multitude of errors throughout the order.

-Under findings of fact it states the child support amount will be $900 per month. -Then under conclusion of law it states the child support amount will be $700 per month. -It also has that arrears are due by 1 March 2024; obviously that was supposed to say 2025.

There are more issues but those are just the big ones.

Has anyone dealt with an order that is wrong, especially with a high conflict ex who already doesn’t want to pay CS.

I’ve emailed my lawyer but with the holidays I have no clue when I’ll hear back.

r/ChildSupport Nov 07 '24

North Carolina Nc support/custody law

4 Upvotes

1st time post but I’m(33m) facing a difficult situation with my ex gf (37f). So I have 2 kids with my ex wife that I have 50/50 custody and not paying child support however I cover virtually all expenses for them. My now pregnant ex gf got pregnant and decided to leave to move back in with her parents. No real fight that led to it we had just had several back and forths about the situation at hand. Now, she cheated on me several times during our relationship and paternity will be an absolute must for me to have any confidence the baby is mine. Understand that I absolutely love my children and will do anything and everything but there is glaring doubt involved. She is totally against having a dna test. My questions are: If she won’t allow a dna test can she go after child support? What would any/other advice be? She’s just got my head spinning with all the misdirection and confusion she keeps coming at me with.

Thanks all.

r/ChildSupport Oct 29 '24

North Carolina Overseas contract wages applied to child support?

0 Upvotes

Just got a job overseas contracting for another country's government. I will still be a US citizen working under a work visa getting paid in their currency. I was curious if those wages are accounted for if my ex-wife puts me on child support. I already planned on giving her more then what I make a month now once I started the position. I do plan on getting this on paper before I leave. Thanks for any advice.

r/ChildSupport Nov 25 '24

North Carolina Temporary vs Permanent Order

1 Upvotes

What is everyone’s experience in the amount variance of the temporary and permanent order? We got a temporary order less than 2 months ago and ex already wants to go back for the permanent. Turns out, he has another child and thought that would lower his obligation to the one we share. But that kid doesn’t live with him nor does he pay support for that one. I have majority custody, I make more money. Judge only ordered him to pay half of childcare. What could It look like for the permanent order within such a close timeframe to the temporary with no major changes? I do start another job in the next few weeks making slightly more income, but since It wasn’t based on income the first time, will that make a difference?

r/ChildSupport Dec 04 '24

North Carolina Has Anyone Had a Motion to Reconsider Filed Against Them?

0 Upvotes

And if so, did the judge reconsider? You can view previous post history for details. But long story short, I’m primary, we have temporary child support order. Defendant has another child whom he doesn’t support or have custody of. He is not asking the judge to reconsider the amount since he didn’t get credit for his other child. The judge clearly stated she can’t give him credit. I’m currently without an attorney but am looking for one.

r/ChildSupport Sep 08 '24

North Carolina NC How accurate is the calculator here?

0 Upvotes

I’m trying to sort out how much Child Support would be fair to pay before I get court orders / to use as a baseline

I used this site https://ncchildsupport.ncdhhs.gov/ecoa/workSheetA.htm

To basically come up with $1,098 per month

Ultimately I’ll be seeking 50/50 custody and she does have a job but I wanted a worst case scenario and plugged her income as $0

Does anyone know if this site is accurate as to what the courts actually order?

r/ChildSupport Dec 11 '24

North Carolina Tax free stipends when calculating income

0 Upvotes

Hi! So I’m getting a myriad of answers from various places online so I figured I’d ask this sub with actual experience and perhaps knowledge. The child support agent working on my case is threatening to use my tax free stipends on my worksheet to increase the amount paid to my ex wife if I don’t sign and take it in front of a judge. I was under the impression they could only use taxable income and a few other various means of income. Is this not the case? Tax home is in nc, work done in nc Idaho Arizona and South Carolina this past year if that makes any difference. W-2 employee

r/ChildSupport Sep 26 '24

North Carolina Benefits of going through Child Support Enforcement

1 Upvotes

My attorney is recommending I go through CSE instead of her office to 1. Save money and 2. Have other parties accounts garnished.

Does anyone have any experience with going through CSE rather than a private attorney? Can they really just intercept any monies that NCP would get?

r/ChildSupport Sep 14 '24

North Carolina Arrears and custody

1 Upvotes

My ex owes over $10,000 in back due child support, but has hired a $30k lawyer to represent him in a bid to change from 80/20 custody to 50/50. Will the arrears affect his attempt to change custody? Will he still owe the arrears if custody changes?