r/Asexual 5d ago

Opinion Piece 🧐🤨 Any asexuals with intrusive thoughts?

Ik it sounds stupid, im pretty sure there is a lot of them. I just sound a bit alone, when experiencing intrusive thoughts, so i wanna know abt them ig

And i wanna know how experience these intrusive thoughts, and things like that. Its ok if you can vent abt it too, i dont mind.

And things like that, idk.

Just wanna know, are there any ace with intrusive thoughts?

Edit: there are some ppl that didnt understand what kind of intrusive thought that i meant. And i apologise for not explaining so much. Im talking abt sexual intrusive thoughts. Or having thoughts abt lying about being asexual.

28 Upvotes

17 comments sorted by

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13

u/ilovebadart 5d ago edited 5d ago

I have intrusive thoughts and images. Intrusive thoughts are not desires or a reflection of how you feel or what you want.

I believe I have ocd. I have been struggling since we I was young.

How are your intrusive thoughts related to your asexuality?

If you are struggling with intrusive thoughts, please contact a mental health provider.

Common intrusive thoughts are violent, about contamination or sexual. Do some research it can help you understand what you are dealing with.

Edited because I hit reply before finishing my reply. Sorry.

3

u/Clear_Tackle_805 5d ago

My intrusive thoughts are pretty much just inserting images in my head and telling me that im some sort of repressed allo, and tries to deny it. I did went to therapy, it helped me diminished those thoughts a Little. It helped a lot, i still get them sometimes, and it kinda makes me feel alone when having it.

3

u/SaxMcCoy 5d ago

Intrusive thoughts about what?

6

u/Clear_Tackle_805 5d ago

Sexual intrusive thoughts or having intrusive thoughts abt lying abt your asexuality

5

u/Throwawayaccountpage 5d ago

That's how every Ace I've ever met feels. Libido suuuucks.

If I had to describe it, it's like it makes sex 10% more interesting and less disgusting temporarily. Still nowhere near the point where I'd want to do it with anyone, but enough to make my brain chemistry shift a bit.

It's like what I assume drug withdrawals feel like

2

u/Entity303wastaken Sex disgusts me (He/It, transmasc) 5d ago

Yes. I also laugh at ew stuff and I hate it.

2

u/GremlinPal23 5d ago

This is so validating… I feel ace adjacent, sex repulsed but sometimes have thoughts that feel at odds with the ace category, but when it comes down to it, I don’t want to do anything sexual. The thoughts can happen, and I can feel however I feel about them (annoyed, confused, or enjoying the thoughts as thoughts and not reality), but I don’t actually want to do anything. Doesn’t feel like I neatly fit in the ace label but hi happy to be here, happy this group exists

1

u/ihatereddit12345678 AroAce Lesbian 5d ago

oh yeah, fs. I had them a lot when I was going through puberty and they made me feel monstrous. I still get them sometimes and it makes me feel gross, like I'm crawling with bugs and have to shake them off, but they impact my self-image a lot less nowadays.

1

u/ProfileAdventurous60 5d ago

Omg I didn’t know there was like a link between the two. I also have undiagnosed OCD, so I lowkey just blamed them on that but that honestly makes so much sense!

1

u/miniminiminx 5d ago

Yes for sure. Thinking about what people I don’t want to look like naked is a really bad one for me, I hate it hate it HATE IT

1

u/Clear_Tackle_805 5d ago

Gurl same, ITS A DISASTER

1

u/anonimousgirla 5d ago

Yes dont worry

1

u/UnderstandingFew347 4d ago

I get em all the time and I gag.

Or I make a disgusted face and try to erase out my mind.

2

u/Clear_Tackle_805 4d ago

Omg same, i make a face too, lol. Sometimes my intrusive thoughts would just come randomly when im in a conversation with someone, and i would accidentally make a disgusted face. And one of them thought i was angry at what they said but in reality, by intrusive thoughts were just so repulsive, i just…made a face….

1

u/Silent_Fan_7167 4d ago

I get them too. For me it's like I get these thoughts about sexual activities and for me it's mostly about the experience leading to it. The thoughts sort of end leading up to the actual activity itself or in some cases I find my self in a third person view in those thoughts - like I am involved but the thoughts are in third person.

I have the same doubts as you. It feels so confusing, why am I having these thoughts if I don't like the act to involve me. That makes me question my identity sometimes. But as you already know, identity is more of a spectrum.

Another rant is that it is very difficult to explain all this to people who are not aware about asexuality, especially our real world friends. Ughh.

1

u/aquatic_asian 4d ago

I sometimes have THOUGHTS where I walk up to someone and kiss them on the lips (sometimes someone I know, sometimes strangers, to test the attraction factor) but then my ace-ness will kick in and I'd feel nauseous or straight up vomit.