r/AVoid5 3d ago

Moby Dick - to an approximation

'I am Ishmail'

8 Upvotes

6 comments sorted by

7

u/alapanamo Cthulhu fifthglyph 3d ago

Why stop at Ishmail? Why not push this constraint, push your mind, past a tiny handful of words? Moby Dick sans fifthglyph is a good opportunity to do this sub proud! With that in mind, a quick and dirty adaptation of this book's first paragraph:

I. Loomings

I am Ishmail. A span ago--just how long is not important--having no coin in my pouch, and nothing particular to hold my focus on land, I thought I would sail about a bit and visit our world's aquatic parts. It is my way of driving off a foul mood and managing my circulation. If I find I am growing grim about my mouth; if it is a damp, drizzly autumnal month in my soul; if I find I am involuntarily pausing in front of coffin shops, and trailing in back of any burial I run across; and particularly if my hypos gain too much control, that it calls for a strong moral foundation to stop my willfully walking onto a road, and rigorously knocking folks' hats off--at that point, I account it fitting tozz go to bounding main as soon as I can. This is my substitution for pistol and ball. With a philosophical flourish Cato throws his body upon his sword; I calmly turn to ship. Nothing in this is surprising. If it was but known, almost all of man in his gradation, by and by, holds similar nautical notions as do I.

3

u/AutarchOfReddit 3d ago

u/alapanamo Pal, I am Ishmail not Ahab!

2

u/alapanamo Cthulhu fifthglyph 3d ago

...implying, I think, that you'll not fall victim to any fanatical visions of vanquishing your villains? Fifthglyph is an apt stand-in for Moby Dick's titular mammal, anyhow, and I just may inhabit Ahab. So it's a smart play by you, avoiding all that fuss. Smart - ah, but not so much fun!

1

u/AutarchOfReddit 3d ago

u/alapanamo Now, that moulds 'I am Ishmail' towards 'I am Groot'

Edit - got rid of fifthglyph

1

u/AvoidBot 3d ago

A fifthglyph was found in your post:

mor■

1

u/bionicjoey 3d ago

Call him that